Wait... what happened to this: http://static.gamesradar.com/images/mb/GamesRadar/us/Daily/2010/03-Mar/23/Portal%202%20Chell/775206--article_image.jpg ??
Piss in the side panel of the toaster, dunk the leather from the boots in the liquid and cook it up with the lighter.
You even have a spork so you can eat with dignity.
Now, stop complaining ;)
I had a lot of fun making this. Depending on if there's more than one guard, I have an alternative ending!
EDIT: Whoops, didn't realize you were supposed to email!
REMOVED ENTRY!
Congrats to the winners. I loved the 'stache too, and the "oh wait, I'm already insane" (LOL) made up for the incomprehensible statement by the chick. And ski-free alone pretty much guarantees a win.
Sorry you guys didn't find mine funny, gotta have some love for arrested development to get...