I understand females perfectly. They're crazy, and that's all you really need to know to understand them. Most, if not all, are bisexual which has been proven with science and alchohol.
De plus, they lack an enzyme in their stomachs that men have that help break down alchohol, so they get...
Spiderman does his 'Curses, foiled again!' dance while yelling "Mother ****er!". Then Batman yells, "The **** is wrong witchu? I heh mah deh no!" Then some other stuff.
Funny.
I see a sign that says "YOU MUST BE AT LEAST THIS OLD TO ENJOY THE BEACH BOYS:" and there's a man with greying hair pointing to the number forty. He's frowning.
stern /stɜrn/ adjective, -er, -est.
1. firm, strict, or uncompromising: stern discipline.
2. hard, harsh, or severe: a stern reprimand.
3. rigorous or austere; of an unpleasantly serious character: stern times.
4. grim or forbidding in aspect: a stern face.
5. irrelevant, unwanted...
Maybe I'm a little touched by the azn presence at UMBC, but the first one is far better than Ms. Potatoface there.
The only real option you have is to get them both drunk and have them fight to the death for you.
And you've got to post a picture of yourself to make things fair, and to help...
<SUSPECT> actually i wanna go down on a girl right now and lick her pussy all over and then her ass too
<SUSPECT> and give her a thoroguh rim job before i pop it in her ass
<Lun4tic> You're very profane
<SUSPECT> is there something wrong with profanity Lun4tic?
<SUSPECT> haven't u ever...