No Rs!

[Que-Ever]

It seems today's popular culture is determined to stomp out the letter R- spinnas, stunnas, hos (previously whores D: ), and of course, my nigga- where have all the Rs gone? We're lucky there aren't any hip-hop pirates... they wouldn't say "arrrr", they'd say "aaaaaaa". I think they're all a bunch of ah-etards.

Rs are important!

 

[Raxxman]

Riiiiiight.

 

[Que-Ever]

I think you mean aiiiiiiight. Axxman.

 

[Absinthe]

Word is bond, yo.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Indeed. Instead of ****er, they say ****a. Instead of mother, they say mutha, and ca instead of car. What is this wold caming to? Whe ah the R's going?

 

[Zephos]

It's a plot devised by ninjas in secret to stop the public using the pirate term "Arrr"...obviously.

 

[CyberPitz]

That's why when someone says that sort of stuff to me...

"Hey, tell me your ABC's."
*They go through them correctly*
"Now, why do you say R in the alphabet, but you never pronoucne it. It's called proper grammer and English, use it."

 

[Reginald]

Ah-ginald.

Sounds like some sort of vaginal cleaner.

 

[CyberPitz]

Ah-ginald.

Sounds like some sort of vaginal cleaner.

Or a urinary Tract Infection type. D:

 

[hungryduck]

I think you mean aiiiiiiight. Axxman.

hah

 

[Link]

Hey, it could be worse...

The European commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English" (or preferably, "SI English").

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords containing "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

 

[bigburpco]

That is freaking awesome.

 

[CyberPitz]

hurt my head at the end...trying to read some of ze words..

AH!

 

[Stigmata]

I'm too tired to try and figure out whether or not that's fake.

 

[CyberPitz]

I'm too tired to try and figure out whether or not that's fake.

I'm sure it is.

 

[NorphTehDwarf]

I'd personally ahgue that the ah is obsolete.