your best story
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Tollbooth Willie
The Freeman
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So one time me and this one legged midget transvestite hoo-
...Pitz can finish this one.
...Pitz can finish this one.
Tollbooth Willie
The Freeman
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I can't believe you still remember that. 
Dynasty
Space Core
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This one time, at band camp...
Sheesh i dunno. Ok heres one to get things rolling:
A few years back, my dad and I drove from Johannesbourg to Cape Town in a rental car, so we could have a car down in Cape Town over our christmas break (company payed for). Now for those of you that dont know, Jo'Berg is about 11.5-12hours drive from Cape Town...even more if you stick to the speed limit...which we didnt.
So anyway, here we are in my dad's dream car, a BMW 5 series diesel, flooring it across the frankly barren wastelands between Jo'Berg and CT. We took the trip in 2 hour shifts, and these roads are straight, not that hilly, and full of mahoooooosive trucks going in either direction.
Choices of music? The new COldplay album, and about 6 U2 CDs. We listened to each one atleast twice. Thats alot of U2, not that i was complaining. Storming along a deserted road at about 190kph, maybe not that fast but our average, AVERAGE speed at the end was 164; ill always remember that, singing 'Vertigo' at the top of our lungs and just having an awesome laugh. One of those father-son moments you never forget.
MY dad works abroad ALOT, and gets payed ALOT to do it (6 figure sallary one year, thanks to bonuses), now I know thats a bit elitest of me to say, but the sallary doesnt match the cost of being away from home. Especially as i was going through my GCSEs without him being around, AND my A-levels, AND Uni now. But anyway im drifting, just thought id point out how an 11 hour drive meant alot to me when some of you are thinking 'thats hardly a moment'.
So where was I, ah yes. This trip got about 3/4 of the way, and things..started going wrong in terms of luck. First of all, we hit what mustve been the world's largest pigeon, smashing the left side of the windscreen leaving a cracked circle about twice the size of a normal dinner plate.
We then hit some kind of bird again, taking the right wingmirror COMPLETELY off.
We then shot through what mustve been some kind of locus swarm of biblical proportions, like i literally couldnt see ANYTHING infront of me, was only for about 10 seconds but that was quite scary actually.
We got pulled over by the police for speeding (haha), but because we werent locals they let us off with a warning...until they realised our tax discs were out of date. Yeah, given a car for rental with out of date tax discs, woopty friggin do. Slapped with quite a hefty fine.
Now this was one of THE funniest things ive ever seen in my life. You know the gap found between a headlight and the bumper? Ever so small right? Well after we had the fine, we were walking back to the car, when i saw a bird leg sticking out of that gap. I pulled at it and the whole leg came off. We unscrewed the headlight, and i kid you not, there was a bird about the size of a robin inside the headlight...it had hit the car so hard, or visa versa, that it has been forced into the gap between the bumper and headlight..i mean how is that physically possible?! That gave us a right laugh for the next hour or so.
Aaaaand upon arriving in CT, we found we'd ran over the world's biggest nail and had a completely flat tire...at a traffic light...in the centre of Cape Town..what a bitch.
Still, greatest trip ive ever been on really. Highly recommend driving it if you want to see the countryside of South Africa, its immense. Alot of it is just fields of..well..dust and dying shrubbery with mountains everywhere, the odd animal farm here and there, but some places are awesome lush with wildlife, dinky towns to go through, loads of history etc.
But yeah ive bored myself now, most of you probably havent read it, its 12:20 so im kinda tired and my writting skills have lowered, im usually funnier
Could go on about cage diving and being surrounded by 3 Great Whites, with one of them being 28ft long, biggest recorded by the company we went with, but hey, maybe once someone else has had a go. largest ever recorded was 36ft or something?
Anyway, NEXT!
Sheesh i dunno. Ok heres one to get things rolling:
A few years back, my dad and I drove from Johannesbourg to Cape Town in a rental car, so we could have a car down in Cape Town over our christmas break (company payed for). Now for those of you that dont know, Jo'Berg is about 11.5-12hours drive from Cape Town...even more if you stick to the speed limit...which we didnt.
So anyway, here we are in my dad's dream car, a BMW 5 series diesel, flooring it across the frankly barren wastelands between Jo'Berg and CT. We took the trip in 2 hour shifts, and these roads are straight, not that hilly, and full of mahoooooosive trucks going in either direction.
Choices of music? The new COldplay album, and about 6 U2 CDs. We listened to each one atleast twice. Thats alot of U2, not that i was complaining. Storming along a deserted road at about 190kph, maybe not that fast but our average, AVERAGE speed at the end was 164; ill always remember that, singing 'Vertigo' at the top of our lungs and just having an awesome laugh. One of those father-son moments you never forget.
MY dad works abroad ALOT, and gets payed ALOT to do it (6 figure sallary one year, thanks to bonuses), now I know thats a bit elitest of me to say, but the sallary doesnt match the cost of being away from home. Especially as i was going through my GCSEs without him being around, AND my A-levels, AND Uni now. But anyway im drifting, just thought id point out how an 11 hour drive meant alot to me when some of you are thinking 'thats hardly a moment'.
So where was I, ah yes. This trip got about 3/4 of the way, and things..started going wrong in terms of luck. First of all, we hit what mustve been the world's largest pigeon, smashing the left side of the windscreen leaving a cracked circle about twice the size of a normal dinner plate.
We then hit some kind of bird again, taking the right wingmirror COMPLETELY off.
We then shot through what mustve been some kind of locus swarm of biblical proportions, like i literally couldnt see ANYTHING infront of me, was only for about 10 seconds but that was quite scary actually.
We got pulled over by the police for speeding (haha), but because we werent locals they let us off with a warning...until they realised our tax discs were out of date. Yeah, given a car for rental with out of date tax discs, woopty friggin do. Slapped with quite a hefty fine.
Now this was one of THE funniest things ive ever seen in my life. You know the gap found between a headlight and the bumper? Ever so small right? Well after we had the fine, we were walking back to the car, when i saw a bird leg sticking out of that gap. I pulled at it and the whole leg came off. We unscrewed the headlight, and i kid you not, there was a bird about the size of a robin inside the headlight...it had hit the car so hard, or visa versa, that it has been forced into the gap between the bumper and headlight..i mean how is that physically possible?! That gave us a right laugh for the next hour or so.
Aaaaand upon arriving in CT, we found we'd ran over the world's biggest nail and had a completely flat tire...at a traffic light...in the centre of Cape Town..what a bitch.
Still, greatest trip ive ever been on really. Highly recommend driving it if you want to see the countryside of South Africa, its immense. Alot of it is just fields of..well..dust and dying shrubbery with mountains everywhere, the odd animal farm here and there, but some places are awesome lush with wildlife, dinky towns to go through, loads of history etc.
But yeah ive bored myself now, most of you probably havent read it, its 12:20 so im kinda tired and my writting skills have lowered, im usually funnier
Could go on about cage diving and being surrounded by 3 Great Whites, with one of them being 28ft long, biggest recorded by the company we went with, but hey, maybe once someone else has had a go. largest ever recorded was 36ft or something?
Anyway, NEXT!
Tollbooth Willie
The Freeman
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Just like you forgot our 2 year anniversary. ;(
C
Cavalry
Guest
I shot a cop.
Then banged his wife.
Then shot her.
and here I am
Then banged his wife.
Then shot her.
and here I am
Seppo
Tank
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my friend once did something similar, but it was a dusty windshield and he wrote "gay"
haha it was very funny at that moment.
sinkoman
Party Escort Bot
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This past weekend was pretty interesting.
I was hanging out with my friend Nicolai and Chris at this guy Ryan's house, when we decide to leave. We end up picking up a bunch of girls (one of which Nicolai is trying his thing with), and heading to this guy Nick's house to chill.
Get there and pretty much everybody there is stoned off of their asses. This guy Alex shows up with a shitload of weed in his car, and a few trays (like the ones they give you at mcdonalds), when somebody gets the idea of tray drifting in a school parking lot nearby.
You basically get the driver to run over two trays with his rear wheel, and lock in the E brake. Now, as it's a Frontwheel drive car, the front pulls the car as the rear slides around on the trays.
So he tries it once, then runs down to a restaurant nearby and jacks a shitload more trays. Comes back, we all pile into his car, and we're sliding around, just being stupid.
This guy Brice asks if he can drive, gets in the drivers seat, and rolls over the trays. Alex tells him to lock in the brake, and Brice pulls it. Alex says harder, so I reach over (i'm in the passenger seat) and lock it up as hard as it will go.
This guy Eddie is outside watching.
Just as Brice lets onto the gas, somebody yells "COPS!".
I hear somebody else yell "BRICE, DROP THE E BRAKE AND GAS IT OUT OF HERE!"
Somebody else yells "****, EDDIE IS RUNNING, THAT DUMBASS" as I see Eddie sprint across the parking lot.
I pray to god that Brice isn't stupid enough to run. He grabs the E brake, and I think to myself "you ****tard, DON'T RUN!!!!". He pulls in the release button, lifts and and tries to drop it, but it's stuck because I pulled it so hard.
"Thank you god"...
I see a cop car come to a screaching halt infront of Eddie as he's trying to run, as they another comes in to collect all of our IDs and gets us to sit down in the middle of the parking lot.
Next thing I know we're sitting there, and there are about 5 cop cars rolling into the parking lot, crunching over all of the trays we left behind, and making a fat circle of headlights around what was about 6 of us.
I sit down next to Nicolai. He tells me "This is so stupid. Cops have nothing better to do with their free time..."
I go "yeah, ****, did they seriously need to send in 6 cars? I guarantee you that 1 would do the trick, I mean, it's not like we were seriously making trouble or anything, just trespassing."
They threaten to arrest us for trespassing, one of them scrubs his hands together and yells, "JACKPOT!".
I notice this candy heart laying on the ground between me and Nicolai, pick it up, turn it over, and printed on it, in thin pink letters, is...
Go Home
****ing hilarious. They ended up just ticketing the driver and getting us to call our parents to take us home since we were out past curfew (1:30 am).
I was hanging out with my friend Nicolai and Chris at this guy Ryan's house, when we decide to leave. We end up picking up a bunch of girls (one of which Nicolai is trying his thing with), and heading to this guy Nick's house to chill.
Get there and pretty much everybody there is stoned off of their asses. This guy Alex shows up with a shitload of weed in his car, and a few trays (like the ones they give you at mcdonalds), when somebody gets the idea of tray drifting in a school parking lot nearby.
You basically get the driver to run over two trays with his rear wheel, and lock in the E brake. Now, as it's a Frontwheel drive car, the front pulls the car as the rear slides around on the trays.
So he tries it once, then runs down to a restaurant nearby and jacks a shitload more trays. Comes back, we all pile into his car, and we're sliding around, just being stupid.
This guy Brice asks if he can drive, gets in the drivers seat, and rolls over the trays. Alex tells him to lock in the brake, and Brice pulls it. Alex says harder, so I reach over (i'm in the passenger seat) and lock it up as hard as it will go.
This guy Eddie is outside watching.
Just as Brice lets onto the gas, somebody yells "COPS!".
I hear somebody else yell "BRICE, DROP THE E BRAKE AND GAS IT OUT OF HERE!"
Somebody else yells "****, EDDIE IS RUNNING, THAT DUMBASS" as I see Eddie sprint across the parking lot.
I pray to god that Brice isn't stupid enough to run. He grabs the E brake, and I think to myself "you ****tard, DON'T RUN!!!!". He pulls in the release button, lifts and and tries to drop it, but it's stuck because I pulled it so hard.
"Thank you god"...
I see a cop car come to a screaching halt infront of Eddie as he's trying to run, as they another comes in to collect all of our IDs and gets us to sit down in the middle of the parking lot.
Next thing I know we're sitting there, and there are about 5 cop cars rolling into the parking lot, crunching over all of the trays we left behind, and making a fat circle of headlights around what was about 6 of us.
I sit down next to Nicolai. He tells me "This is so stupid. Cops have nothing better to do with their free time..."
I go "yeah, ****, did they seriously need to send in 6 cars? I guarantee you that 1 would do the trick, I mean, it's not like we were seriously making trouble or anything, just trespassing."
They threaten to arrest us for trespassing, one of them scrubs his hands together and yells, "JACKPOT!".
I notice this candy heart laying on the ground between me and Nicolai, pick it up, turn it over, and printed on it, in thin pink letters, is...
Go Home
****ing hilarious. They ended up just ticketing the driver and getting us to call our parents to take us home since we were out past curfew (1:30 am).
dfc05
Tank
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Once upon a time...
I was in Boulder, Colorado over the summer with a group of students. One night, we decided to stop by a couple of cd stores in Denver. Yeah, we had been in Boulder so long that the most interesting thing to do anymore was to go to the record store... in Denver.
It was me and a couple of guys going -- let's call them John and Bob.
John's friend, Will, was visiting from Kansas. But Will wasn't visiting just for John. Will was a member of the Bahai faith. Apparently Will had met a girl at a Bahai get-together, and he thought he might marry her. Or something. It was strange.
Anyways, this girl was having a Bahai meeting at her house in some suburb in southern Denver. Will had a car. After a lengthy discussion about how to get to Denver (bus? Will's car?) we decided that we'll accompany Will in his car... to the Bahai meeting.
We make it to this girl's house. The Bahai meeting was already under way. We walk with Will up to the door... and then we get sucked in by the overwhelming friendliness of Bahai. They had just finished playing board games, and they were about to start singing songs. Possibly... Bahai songs? I look over at John and Bob and they have this expression, something like: "We're going to get stuck here and the next thing we know, we'll be in pajamas and sleeping bags, sitting in a circle, singing happy Bahai songs. OH CRAP."
But we manage to get ourselves out of the Bahai meeting, and then we get to a bus stop in the middle of nowhere in some suburb in Denver. After waiting for over half an hour, hoping that a bus will come so we don't have to spend the night at the Bahai sleepover party, the right bus finally comes. We get on and ask how to get to the bus to the record store. We need to stop at one of those big bus transfer locations. It is by a mall. Seems like a good plan...
We make it to the bus transfer spot. It is very dark. And we get off this bus... and discover that the bus transfer spot happens to be a really creepy bum hangout at night. I've seen creepy bums on the bus. I've once taken a bus early in the morning and had a guy sit right behind me when there were lots of other empty seats to choose from, and take off his hat, and lean over and brush the hat against my head, and chuckle. That was nothing compared to this bus transfer spot. It was truly scary.
All sorts of things were rushing through my mind: "Where the heck are we. Maybe we can just hang out at the mall. Maybe this isn't the bus stop we're supposed to wait at. Maybe there's another bus stop just down the street that isn't overrun with creepy people. Maybe we can just walk all the way to the record store. Please just get me out of here. If only I had stayed at the Bahai meeting, I could be all warm and cuddly in PJ's and a sleeping bag singing happy Bahai songs. Why does my life suck so much. Why did things have to be this way. I don't wanna die like this. WHY ME??? WHYYYYY?????"
Luckily the bus comes within a minute so we didn't have to deal with getting maimed or robbed or offered drugs or anything. We make it to the first record store. It's closing in 10 minutes. So John makes some hasty purchases in the international section... I believe he grabbed "Dance Music of Malaysia" (a cd of what sounds like crappy recordings in dance clubs) and "Country Music of Thailand" which wasn't country music but just music that people play in the countryside in Thailand. We walk most of the way to the second record store. And around midnight, we make it to the bus back home.
Overall, it was a good time.
I was in Boulder, Colorado over the summer with a group of students. One night, we decided to stop by a couple of cd stores in Denver. Yeah, we had been in Boulder so long that the most interesting thing to do anymore was to go to the record store... in Denver.
It was me and a couple of guys going -- let's call them John and Bob.
John's friend, Will, was visiting from Kansas. But Will wasn't visiting just for John. Will was a member of the Bahai faith. Apparently Will had met a girl at a Bahai get-together, and he thought he might marry her. Or something. It was strange.
Anyways, this girl was having a Bahai meeting at her house in some suburb in southern Denver. Will had a car. After a lengthy discussion about how to get to Denver (bus? Will's car?) we decided that we'll accompany Will in his car... to the Bahai meeting.
We make it to this girl's house. The Bahai meeting was already under way. We walk with Will up to the door... and then we get sucked in by the overwhelming friendliness of Bahai. They had just finished playing board games, and they were about to start singing songs. Possibly... Bahai songs? I look over at John and Bob and they have this expression, something like: "We're going to get stuck here and the next thing we know, we'll be in pajamas and sleeping bags, sitting in a circle, singing happy Bahai songs. OH CRAP."
But we manage to get ourselves out of the Bahai meeting, and then we get to a bus stop in the middle of nowhere in some suburb in Denver. After waiting for over half an hour, hoping that a bus will come so we don't have to spend the night at the Bahai sleepover party, the right bus finally comes. We get on and ask how to get to the bus to the record store. We need to stop at one of those big bus transfer locations. It is by a mall. Seems like a good plan...
We make it to the bus transfer spot. It is very dark. And we get off this bus... and discover that the bus transfer spot happens to be a really creepy bum hangout at night. I've seen creepy bums on the bus. I've once taken a bus early in the morning and had a guy sit right behind me when there were lots of other empty seats to choose from, and take off his hat, and lean over and brush the hat against my head, and chuckle. That was nothing compared to this bus transfer spot. It was truly scary.
All sorts of things were rushing through my mind: "Where the heck are we. Maybe we can just hang out at the mall. Maybe this isn't the bus stop we're supposed to wait at. Maybe there's another bus stop just down the street that isn't overrun with creepy people. Maybe we can just walk all the way to the record store. Please just get me out of here. If only I had stayed at the Bahai meeting, I could be all warm and cuddly in PJ's and a sleeping bag singing happy Bahai songs. Why does my life suck so much. Why did things have to be this way. I don't wanna die like this. WHY ME??? WHYYYYY?????"
Luckily the bus comes within a minute so we didn't have to deal with getting maimed or robbed or offered drugs or anything. We make it to the first record store. It's closing in 10 minutes. So John makes some hasty purchases in the international section... I believe he grabbed "Dance Music of Malaysia" (a cd of what sounds like crappy recordings in dance clubs) and "Country Music of Thailand" which wasn't country music but just music that people play in the countryside in Thailand. We walk most of the way to the second record store. And around midnight, we make it to the bus back home.
Overall, it was a good time.
Dekstar
Companion Cube
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OMG I'm a baha'i! Didn't think anyone on these forums knew anything about it.
Anyway as for funny stories, I don't really have any. One time when I was a bit of a prick, me and two friends were trying to be rebellious, and went knock-and-running at our school. At night. When apparently no one was about. Anyway so we'd been at this school for about four or five years, and so we knew our way around, apparently. We started knocking on all the doors, then running like mad to a safe spot behind some bushes or whatever, then moving on to the next door.
After some time we got to the final door, which was part of an extension to the school (quite recent). We knock, and then just stand there like "well that was a boring waste of a night" when suddenly the door swings open, revealing the entire school staff. We almost shit ourselves, and make a run for it, running directly into the ONE and ONLY dead end of the school. Well ****ing great, we're cornered, and in the one place we know like the back of our hands.
We got a stern telling off and got sent on our way. I stopped hanging round with those kids soon after.
Anyway as for funny stories, I don't really have any. One time when I was a bit of a prick, me and two friends were trying to be rebellious, and went knock-and-running at our school. At night. When apparently no one was about. Anyway so we'd been at this school for about four or five years, and so we knew our way around, apparently. We started knocking on all the doors, then running like mad to a safe spot behind some bushes or whatever, then moving on to the next door.
After some time we got to the final door, which was part of an extension to the school (quite recent). We knock, and then just stand there like "well that was a boring waste of a night" when suddenly the door swings open, revealing the entire school staff. We almost shit ourselves, and make a run for it, running directly into the ONE and ONLY dead end of the school. Well ****ing great, we're cornered, and in the one place we know like the back of our hands.
We got a stern telling off and got sent on our way. I stopped hanging round with those kids soon after.
dfc05
Tank
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Wow, Boulder, huh? Sorry to hear that...most everybody in Denver stays away from Boulder
Oh really? Why's that? I heard Boulder was rated the #1 place to live in the US. It was a pretty place, but kinda boring after a while. My friends thought Denver smelled bad. I didn't notice anything because I grew up with nasty city smells. I mostly miss the record store... we went to Twist and Shout. They had a pretty good selection of stuff.
Emporius
Space Core
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You kind of had to be there, but here goes.
Wanted Bob and I were in the middle of our 24-day canoe trip when we came across our longest portage on trip, 1.5 k. Now that's not too bad of a length, I've done worse, so I set out with Wanted Bob down the trail. Me with a personal and canoe, Wanted Bob with a massive food pack. It was fairly easy going at first, some minor bushwhacks, some roots here and there.
And then we reached the swamp.
close to 800 meters of swampy goodness, with large holes hidden in the mud. But as we begin to enter my shoulders start to ache badly, so Wanted Bob, being the chivilarous guy he is, offers to switch for a bit. So I teepee it up for him, throw on the packs, and let him take the lead. He takes about three steps and
FOOOOOOMF!
Sinks up to his nipples in mud. Even though he is still holding the canoe on his shoulders, the gunwales are brushing the ground. I stand there in awed silence for a second before I shake it off and say in a slightly panicky voice: "Hey *insert his name here*, do you want me to get help?"
and in the most calm and nonchalant voice I have ever heard, up to his nipples in mud with a canoe on his back, he says to me:
"No, no I'm good."
Needless to say I carried the canoe for the rest of the portage.
Wanted Bob and I were in the middle of our 24-day canoe trip when we came across our longest portage on trip, 1.5 k. Now that's not too bad of a length, I've done worse, so I set out with Wanted Bob down the trail. Me with a personal and canoe, Wanted Bob with a massive food pack. It was fairly easy going at first, some minor bushwhacks, some roots here and there.
And then we reached the swamp.
close to 800 meters of swampy goodness, with large holes hidden in the mud. But as we begin to enter my shoulders start to ache badly, so Wanted Bob, being the chivilarous guy he is, offers to switch for a bit. So I teepee it up for him, throw on the packs, and let him take the lead. He takes about three steps and
FOOOOOOMF!
Sinks up to his nipples in mud. Even though he is still holding the canoe on his shoulders, the gunwales are brushing the ground. I stand there in awed silence for a second before I shake it off and say in a slightly panicky voice: "Hey *insert his name here*, do you want me to get help?"
and in the most calm and nonchalant voice I have ever heard, up to his nipples in mud with a canoe on his back, he says to me:
"No, no I'm good."
Needless to say I carried the canoe for the rest of the portage.
dfc05
Tank
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I see. I was at Pearl Street once and the street performers were out. I was watching this guy and he's doing his thing, making jokes and so forth, and he says, "I used to attend the University of Texas at Austin. And look where it got me!"
Coincidentally, I'm a student at UT Austin right now.
Acepilotf14
Sucked so much dick for this title
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I woke up at 2 in the morning, thought it was six, didn't look at the clock, took a shower, looked at the clock, went back to bed.
Emporius
Space Core
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I woke up at 10:30, thought it was 7:30, took a shower, looked at the clock, booked it to school.
Sneaki
Spy
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The other day I bought an ice cream (on a cone), I was about to bite it...when a huge piece of ice cream fell off! In one swift movement, I caught the chunk of ice cream in my left hand and shoved it back onto the cone. I then ate the ice cream, and lived happily ever after.
TheDude
Newbie
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So the other night I was balls deep in this guys asshole. I'm going at it and about 15 minutes later I finish up. As I'm throwing on my clothes to leave, Seth says to me "don't you want to cuddle?" So I says to him "what are you gay?" Needless to say I got out of there in a hurry.
Que-Ever
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I went to a rehearsal for a school musical last week, but apparently it got moved to a different location or something, and so the only people who showed up were me, a very awkward and socailly inept freshie, and this girl that I liked. THe kid had "truth or dare" on his cell phone, but it was really crappy and it was pretty much the worst game I've ever played.
Oh, yeah, and me and the girl ended up making out. In front of the guy. He was really shocked.
Oh, yeah, and me and the girl ended up making out. In front of the guy. He was really shocked.
Phobie
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Stigmata actually TOLD ME this story a few days ago, and lol'd.
Darkside55
The Freeman
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There was this one time.
Woke up in the morning, everything felt a little different. Couldn't put my finger on it. Maybe it was something in the air; cleaner, more refreshing. Maybe it was that I wasn't woken up by the barking of the neighbor's damn dogs.
Mom'd already made breakfast. No sausage. No bacon. Not even ham; just hashbrowns and some eggs and toast. I ate lightly. Got a call from a girl while at the table; I asked her if she was down for anything later; we scheduled something as I left the house.
Jumped in my convertible. It's old but I keep it in good shape. And it's got hydros; I lowered the back. Because of that I've gotta watch out everytime I stop at a light, but nobody was eying my car like they wanted to strip it for parts.
That girl I was talking to earlier--we'll call her "Kim"--paged me to finalize details and let me know what she had planned for the night. Cool.
I had a lot of time to kill, so I called up some friends and asked them where they were shooting hoops at. Played a few rounds, and did pretty good if I say so myself. Actually I smashed on 'em if I do say so myself, but it wasn't as good as the week before.
Headed home to take a quick shower; I ran the intersection right in front of a cop car but he didn't even care. I don't know whether he saw me or not.
Went to another friend's house; him and some other guys were there watching MTV and shooting dice. I took all their money; they tried to win it back at dominoes but I took their cash in that too.
Left my friend's house a little richer. Went and picked up Kim; lemme tell you guys, I'd been trying to get with this girl since highschool. I brought some beer and we got wasted; watched a basketball game (Lakers won) and then her and I...retired.
Woke up at 1am; drove her home and I went out cruising. Everything was unusually quiet; no police sirens, no choppers. Around 2am I picked up some fast food. Early morning and close to home, and people were still trying to hit me up.
Didn't even have to bust anybody.
That was a good day.
Woke up in the morning, everything felt a little different. Couldn't put my finger on it. Maybe it was something in the air; cleaner, more refreshing. Maybe it was that I wasn't woken up by the barking of the neighbor's damn dogs.
Mom'd already made breakfast. No sausage. No bacon. Not even ham; just hashbrowns and some eggs and toast. I ate lightly. Got a call from a girl while at the table; I asked her if she was down for anything later; we scheduled something as I left the house.
Jumped in my convertible. It's old but I keep it in good shape. And it's got hydros; I lowered the back. Because of that I've gotta watch out everytime I stop at a light, but nobody was eying my car like they wanted to strip it for parts.
That girl I was talking to earlier--we'll call her "Kim"--paged me to finalize details and let me know what she had planned for the night. Cool.
I had a lot of time to kill, so I called up some friends and asked them where they were shooting hoops at. Played a few rounds, and did pretty good if I say so myself. Actually I smashed on 'em if I do say so myself, but it wasn't as good as the week before.
Headed home to take a quick shower; I ran the intersection right in front of a cop car but he didn't even care. I don't know whether he saw me or not.
Went to another friend's house; him and some other guys were there watching MTV and shooting dice. I took all their money; they tried to win it back at dominoes but I took their cash in that too.
Left my friend's house a little richer. Went and picked up Kim; lemme tell you guys, I'd been trying to get with this girl since highschool. I brought some beer and we got wasted; watched a basketball game (Lakers won) and then her and I...retired.
Woke up at 1am; drove her home and I went out cruising. Everything was unusually quiet; no police sirens, no choppers. Around 2am I picked up some fast food. Early morning and close to home, and people were still trying to hit me up.
Didn't even have to bust anybody.
That was a good day.
Druckles
Party Escort Bot
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2004
- Messages
- 10,652
- Reaction score
- 26
Argh, reminds me of that awful animation "I've got a sausage". It just repeats... and it's awful... and it just goes... round... and round... and... round... round... round...
in... the...
head...
round...
...round... round...
...
round...
in... the...
head...
round...
...round... round...
...
round...
Dan
Tank
- Joined
- May 28, 2003
- Messages
- 4,186
- Reaction score
- 3
It was fertilizer and pot. I got a months free rent cause of it.
Tollbooth Willie
The Freeman
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2005
- Messages
- 17,553
- Reaction score
- 830
You make me feel aretarded.
sinkoman
Party Escort Bot
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2004
- Messages
- 7,457
- Reaction score
- 21
Today was a good day...
