i think im going insane?

CptStern said:
instead of constantly dwelling on this why not seek professional help?
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Well, I scheduled an appointment to see the school councilor (not sure what her credentials are) but I really don't know what they can tell me that would help.

I got myself out of anxiety/depression state before and have been trying to use the same techniques in this situation but it's not working. I've read up on CBT and stuff like that but I highly doubt it would work on me..but i'm still willing to try, just skeptical.
 
AKIRA said:
Well, I scheduled an appointment to see the school councilor (not sure what her credentials are) but I really don't know what they can tell me that would help.
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ffs, man! my school councilour was a moron ..nice guy but dumb as a post. they're not trained for those types of problems

dont listen to helplife2.net go and see your family doctor. thy will refer you to a specialist. it's all covered under ohip so you have no excuse not to go. seriously dont take advice from the internet see a doctor
 
I'm loathe to suggest anything because I am not a mental health professional, it's good you've already made an appt, though. Any good psychiatrist will suggest hormone/vitamin panels, as well as test thyroid levels. Ruling out physical problems is usually a first good step.

As far as the depersonalization goes, I've heard that can often be a coping mechanism for anxiety, and about the "I feel I'm going insane" bit, that is common in people with anxiety disorders such as GAD and OCD. I'm not saying you have either of those, though.
 
Well, I scheduled an appointment to see the school councilor (not sure what her credentials are) but I really don't know what they can tell me that would help
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A doctor has seen hundreds if not thousands of patients over the years, and would have a pretty good idea what's wrong with you since they have probably seen it before.

A good doctor will rapid fire questions and within a span of 30 minutes, your answers would send up all kinds of bells and flags as to what your condition may be - and if you even have one.

If your girlfriend moving her furniture was traumatic or disturbing for you, I'm pretty sure that isn't normal and you should see a doctor.

Mood disorders - if you have one - are a hell of a lot more serious than they sound. Your mood enables you. If (for example) someone felt like their dog died every single day, I'm sure you can see how that would drastically interfere with their life.

I just realized you live in Canada, so with universal health-care you should have no excuse not to set up an appointment. I have been seeing a Psychiatric and mental health nurse practitioner [PMHNP].

1. You set up an appointment.
2. they give you some papers to fill out, where you list what's wrong with you (for example, anxiety). (There's a large checklist of all the common problems).
3. You talk with them and discuss your problems. If they think you need medication (for example, anxiety meds) they can prescribe it for you.
4. Return for checkup/s to be sure your well-being is improved.
 
The thing is I can function normally like go out, do assignments and stuff but i'm just feel "flat" all the time. I don't even panic anymore even. It's just like somebody sucked out emotion from me. I don't understand it because I literally felt fine like last month.

I definitely will see someone else if the school councilor doesn't help..i'll actually ask her for her credentials and go from there. I'm going to see her tuesday.

I guess the closest thing I can relate to this is OCD. But it's OCD in terms of thinking over things to the point where they become meaningless. Maybe it's that that is causing my "emotionless" state.
 
man just go see your family doctor. that's exactly what the school coucilour will recommend. he/she are not medically trained and wouldnt be able to make any sort of diagnosis besides "you're shouldnt commit to going to unversity x until you've heard back from university y" ..seriously man that's like going to see a boat captain when you have problems with your shrubbery
 
Except you know... all psychiatrists are quacks.

/scientologist
 
AKIRA said:
TI definitely will see someone else if the school councilor doesn't help..i'll actually ask her for her credentials and go from there. I'm going to see her tuesday.
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In Canada, school counselors must be certified teachers with additional school counseling training.
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Basically more appropriate for bullying or something. A doctor has like a decade of higher education and a specialization in the field, not to mention years of experience before they even get their first patient.
 
VirusType2 said:
Basically more appropriate for bullying or something. A doctor has like a decade of higher education and a specialization in the field, not to mention years of experience before they even get their first patient.
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This is what is posted on my schools website that leads me to believe that they have some sort of credentials but again, I'll ask anyway.
Welcome to Sheridan Counselling Services.

Sheridan's staff and Counsellors are available to assist with any of your concerns. Counselling Services are offered to assist students in building solutions to their own personal, emotional or interpersonal concerns that may be impacting academic success at Sheridan.

Counselling appointments are free, confidential and readily available for your benefit.

We offer drop-in sessions for your convenience. You can sign up for a drop-in appointment on the same day that you would like to see a Counsellor by coming to our office in B103 Trafalgar or B230 Davis. We also offer appointments and can make referrals to other community services.
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http://www.sheridanc.on.ca/services/student support services/counselling services.aspx

Counsellors


Sheridan Counsellors are trained and experienced in a range of counseling modalities and teaching and learning techniques. Our strength-based solution-focused approach with students is respectful, confidential and success oriented. We teach and empower students to develop their strengths in order to achieve goals, solve problems and maintain balance.
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lol you go to sheridan. I went there briefly for animation. also that doesnt say anything about being medically trained. go to a real doctor. all they'll do is refer you to a specialist
 
You have to be joking about a school councilor. I don't understand why you won't call the doctor right now.

You are depressed.

>"lack of interest in things that you would normally enjoy for a month, for little reason"

You seem to be in denial that there could be anything wrong with you and that's why you won't seek help.
 
VirusType2 said:
You have to be joking about a school councilor. I don't understand why you won't call the doctor right now.

You are depressed.

>"lack of interest in things that you would normally enjoy for a month, for little reason"

You seem to be in denial that there could be anything wrong with you and that's why you won't seek help.
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I'm not in denial. I know I'm depressed it's just a different kind of depression that i've come across. I can't see a doctor until next week (i'm tied up with school at the moment).

Also, I've always been against the idea of meds but if they are prescribed to me I'm certainly going to give them a try. What scares me are a few things that maybe one of you guys can give me some insight with.

1. What if the meds don't work, what other options are there? i don't want to keep dwelling on this and really start making it my whole life (now I can function normally just this is in the background and is noticeable..I don't want it to take center stage of my life if you know what I mean).

2. What if the meds work and I become dependent on them? What if my mind says well you feel better only because of the meds, once you're off them you'll be aware of it and the cycle will repeat.

3. I've heard about some nasty side effects with meds that I'd REALLY rather not experience.
 
AKIRA said:
1. What if the meds don't work, what other options are there? i don't want to keep dwelling on this and really start making it my whole life (now I can function normally just this is in the background and is noticeable..I don't want it to take center stage of my life if you know what I mean).

2. What if the meds work and I become dependent on them? What if my mind says well you feel better only because of the meds, once you're off them you'll be aware of it and the cycle will repeat.

3. I've heard about some nasty side effects with meds that I'd REALLY rather not experience.
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1. Life changes - like taking out the triggers for depression, if possible. Staying up late or physical inactivity could be a trigger, for example.

2. I don't think there are many long term medications that cause dependence. Generally dependence goes hand in hand with tolerance, so I can't see that working long term.

3. Indeed. There are side effects with all medications. Any effect that isn't intended is a side effect. Recreational drugs like Alcohol and tobacco have plenty of side effects.


But I'm the same way - the side effects are a legitimate concern. Therefore I've never been on any medication, and therefore my life has always been in shambles.

They can't force you to take anything though.. dude, people take medication because the trade off is worth it for them. Otherwise, nobody would be on medication.


I negotiated with my doctor and got a long list of medications (that might help me) for me to consider. I spent all day researching them, and there's one that I am willing to try (side effects are mild). Waiting for a call back from her.

Mostly I'm just interested in the sedative effect, since I have mania. I have self medicated with tobacco, alcohol, and marijuana for 20 years for the sedative effect. I had to drop weed though, it often exacerbates my condition.
 
AKIRA said:
I'm not in denial. I know I'm depressed it's just a different kind of depression that i've come across. I can't see a doctor until next week (i'm tied up with school at the moment).
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school councilor cant help you with depression a doctor can

AKIRA said:
Also, I've always been against the idea of meds but if they are prescribed to me I'm certainly going to give them a try. What scares me are a few things that maybe one of you guys can give me some insight with.

1. What if the meds don't work, what other options are there? i don't want to keep dwelling on this and really start making it my whole life (now I can function normally just this is in the background and is noticeable..I don't want it to take center stage of my life if you know what I mean).
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then they adjust the dosage or offer up alternative drugs. it's usually therapy with meds not just meds

AKIRA said:
2. What if the meds work and I become dependent on them? What if my mind says well you feel better only because of the meds, once you're off them you'll be aware of it and the cycle will repeat.
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meds are a way of managing the problem not curing it. and they usually watch for that and make adjustments. bottom line is you wont know until you talk to a doctor

AKIRA said:
3. I've heard about some nasty side effects with meds that I'd REALLY rather not experience.
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I've seen people on anti-psychotic drugs and those people had lifelong mental problems and while some suffered from side effects they were usually as a result of toxicity; on the drug too long but these people had severe problems
 
Go to the councilor anyway, just talking about it might be a help. Sometimes all it takes is for someone to help you look at things in a different way.

Also my brother was on medication for depression and it didn't really help a whole lot. It just sort of 'numbed' him.
 
<RJMC> said:
masturbate
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This is sierious please take it so,

This unhappiness is it lonelyness?
just not caring about stuff?
bored?

could stress have triggered this?
I mean it can be a cause to cure it and to cause it,
I thrive on stress and the stupidity of others
I don't like thinking i am supirior but I feel that way when a person thinks school is a waste of time or that they do not care about grades that stresses me out and it keeps me up
 
It is a extremly good thing you are telling us this, some people start out like this and don't tell anyone but then commit suicide, a girl who did this said she was the best actress ever in her suicide note

Don't think that I think that you will commit suicide but as in It is a good thing you are trying to obtain help before it worsense

Oh and this isn't a joke video but here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlBiLNN1NhQ
 
Akira, do you drink coffee, tea, or hot chocolate? Most of the time, preparing a hot beverage like that brings me right up. I sometimes go manic just watching it heat up. And drinking it also works the same. This is proven to potentially trigger the reward center of your brain (make you feel good). So when I was talking about triggers before, this would be the opposite. Actually for me, it is a trigger (for mania), but on the other hand for depression, it should bring up your spirits.

By the way, my doctor called back and OK'd my choice of meds. It works in about 50% of people with my condition and the side effects are significantly less than something like Asprin, even. So I'm really hopeful, but cautiously so because everyone is different. Even if it is effective, it may not be enough or treat the worst parts of my condition, meaning I may have to try something else.

My final point for the night is to keep in mind that side effects don't always manifest. For example, Asprin has potential side effects like gastrointestinal ulcers and stomach bleeding, but I've never known anyone who has had that problem. You are right to be cautious; some of the side effects may be unacceptable (if you have them), but I wouldn't dismiss your options off-hand. I mean, at least talk to the doctor - don't avoid going simply because you feel medication isn't the answer - because maybe it's not.

I personally felt it was very helpful to find out that I had manic depressive disorder, because then I was able to better understand myself. Now I am able to better address the problems that I face.
 
VirusType2 said:
Akira, do you drink coffee, tea, or hot chocolate? Most of the time, preparing a hot beverage like that brings me right up. I sometimes go manic just watching it heat up. And drinking it also works the same. This is proven to potentially trigger the reward center of your brain (make you feel good). So when I was talking about triggers before, this would be the opposite. Actually for me, it is a trigger (for mania), but on the other hand for depression, it should bring up your spirits.

By the way, my doctor called back and OK'd my choice of meds. It works in about 50% of people with my condition and the side effects are significantly less than something like Asprin, even. So I'm really hopeful, but cautiously so because everyone is different. Even if it is effective, it may not be enough or treat the worst parts of my condition, meaning I may have to try something else.

My final point for the night is to keep in mind that side effects don't always manifest. For example, Asprin has potential side effects like gastrointestinal ulcers and stomach bleeding, but I've never known anyone who has had that problem. You are right to be cautious; some of the side effects may be unacceptable (if you have them), but I wouldn't dismiss your options off-hand. I mean, at least talk to the doctor - don't avoid going simply because you feel medication isn't the answer - because maybe it's not.

I personally felt it was very helpful to find out that I had manic depressive disorder, because then I was able to better understand myself. Now I am able to better address the problems that I face.
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I've had worse depression/anxiety than this, the difference was that I knew what caused it and when I did things that used to make me feel better I still felt it even at my worst (very slightly but I knew it was there). This time it could be just because things sort of suck right now, school is incredibly boring, nobody really comes to class and when they do we don't really talk/hang out like we used to, shit with my gf basically started this and my friends at home rarely hang out too.

So when I think about the past it often triggers a sense of sadness because the past was just so much better than it was now and that I didn't ANALYZE EVERY SINGLE PART OF MY LIFE.

That last capitilized sentence is the big one. It's one thing to be depressed and anxious - that I can deal with on my own because I have in the past several times (it's normal, people get depressed/anxious all the time). But this time, for whatever reason, I'm over-analyzing everything. I don't feel like there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe it's because I was JUST starting to recover before and this shit came too soon I don't know.

I will definitely contact my Dr to refer me to a specialist, just someone to talk to first because this is clearly isn't normal.

One thing I don't get though is I think I purposefully made myself like this. Rewind 3 weeks ago and I knew exactly what was wrong and what I needed to do. When that didn't pan out, I started searching for other answers and then everything just sort of spiralled out of control from there..I just over-analyzed my condition to the point where i've driven my own self into the position I'm in now.

Perhaps I need meds + cognitive behavioral therapy to eliminate this train of thought because it can be very self destructive. Sort of like what OCD people go through except I don't have any OCD tendencies other than me over analyzing things.
 
I suggest you stop dating for a while (at least until you get sorted out) because I think this is the root of your problem. You wouldn't be the only one that cannot handle a serious relationship. Love is painful as **** - there's no way around it. It seems to be triggering this state.
 
I always wanted a relationship until I almost got into one, soon realized I love being single o.o
 
Coulde this be a seasonal something dissorder, I know it is abbreviated as SAD and seasonal and dissorder are in it. My mom had it but I can't remember its name.
Any way could this be the cause?
 
Akira you have an anxiety disorder which is a mental disorder, it revolves around the amygdala which is responsible for autonomic responses associated with fear, emotional responses and memory. That's why you have panic attacks, and get anxious and disturbing thoughts, and why for some reason you do the things you used to do and they no longer bring any emotion whatsoever. Its a hormonal imbalance in that part of the brain.

You've posted about this experiences many times and many times I have replied but I think my posts were always just lost in everyone elses attempts to try and determine what you had. Your experiences are everything I can relate to perfectly, the whole detachment from self, from your environment, from your loved ones, is all symptoms of derealization and depersonalization for which having done a lot of research in the right places, are only associated with anxiety disorders.

When you talked about your gf moving the bed and it confused you a lot, well recently my parents merely changed the door downstairs to the living room, so it would open from the opposite direction, and I too was really perturbed by this when I came home to it, it didn't feel right at all and it was disturbing. Your entire surroundings feel almost dream like, like a fog has come over your perception and distorting it, and everything feels more distant and almost alien like. You would see your friends wherever, you would see your gf, you would go to the shops, all things you have done times before and they all had a certain feeling to them, but that feeling is no longer there. For instance home doesn't feel like home anymore, you can't make connections with certain things anymore.

I've had it worst than this, when I first got it I went through years of shortness of breath, panic attacks, general fatigue all of the time, paleness in skin, a general feeling of weakness everywhere, pressure bands around my head and eyes and of course severe cases of anxiety. There was a time a few summers ago where basically everything was in the process of freaking me out, I play guitar and gig with my band a lot and love it, but back then even thinking about gigging would send me into panic. However for me the whole detachment from surroundings thing is the most disturbing symptom, and its the only one that has seemed to linger to even now, while all the others went away.

The only way you can beat this thing is by embracing all the things you are getting now, just accepting them and letting them take over because at the end of the day, they are not harmful in any way, they are just a result of the part of the brain controlling the fight/flight response not working the way it should do, which creates all these insane side effects. You are most certainly not going insane, really because I have gone through everything you have and I didn't, and those who go insane never know its happening to them, they will usually be very defensive against it.

Take solace in the premise that the symptoms you are going through are not harmful in any way, they are scary yes, and very annoying, but just let them come and distract yourself from them as best as you can. Occupy your mind with work, games, reading, tv or go out and spend time with your friends, you girlfriend, have an insane night, do all these things even if you feel really bad and can't take it, and continue to do it, and trust me, it will pass in time. Anxiety disorder is triggered by certain memories, what you have to do is force your brain to stop that trigger by replacing that certain memory with something else. It sounds complicated but you can finds many help packages to help with it, I advise you look up a guy called Charles Lindel, a previous sufferer of it, who created an entire process by which to defeat it.

Now I still experience these feeling of derealization even now, but I've trained my mind to put it to the back of every other thought process, and I just continue with everything I'm doing, even if its really bad, so bad even that I look at my girlfriend and feel nothing, you just ignore it and it passes and gets easier, trust me on that. Hope this helps.
 
Well, I suggest this to make you feel better:
YOU ARE FINE. NOTHING IS WRONG. SEND STYLO MONEY AND MAKE HIM SANDWICHES.

hypnotoad.gif
 
Shift said:
Akira you have an anxiety disorder which is a mental disorder, it revolves around the amygdala which is responsible for autonomic responses associated with fear, emotional responses and memory. That's why you have panic attacks, and get anxious and disturbing thoughts, and why for some reason you do the things you used to do and they no longer bring any emotion whatsoever. Its a hormonal imbalance in that part of the brain.

You've posted about this experiences many times and many times I have replied but I think my posts were always just lost in everyone elses attempts to try and determine what you had. Your experiences are everything I can relate to perfectly, the whole detachment from self, from your environment, from your loved ones, is all symptoms of derealization and depersonalization for which having done a lot of research in the right places, are only associated with anxiety disorders.

When you talked about your gf moving the bed and it confused you a lot, well recently my parents merely changed the door downstairs to the living room, so it would open from the opposite direction, and I too was really perturbed by this when I came home to it, it didn't feel right at all and it was disturbing. Your entire surroundings feel almost dream like, like a fog has come over your perception and distorting it, and everything feels more distant and almost alien like. You would see your friends wherever, you would see your gf, you would go to the shops, all things you have done times before and they all had a certain feeling to them, but that feeling is no longer there. For instance home doesn't feel like home anymore, you can't make connections with certain things anymore.

I've had it worst than this, when I first got it I went through years of shortness of breath, panic attacks, general fatigue all of the time, paleness in skin, a general feeling of weakness everywhere, pressure bands around my head and eyes and of course severe cases of anxiety. There was a time a few summers ago where basically everything was in the process of freaking me out, I play guitar and gig with my band a lot and love it, but back then even thinking about gigging would send me into panic. However for me the whole detachment from surroundings thing is the most disturbing symptom, and its the only one that has seemed to linger to even now, while all the others went away.

The only way you can beat this thing is by embracing all the things you are getting now, just accepting them and letting them take over because at the end of the day, they are not harmful in any way, they are just a result of the part of the brain controlling the fight/flight response not working the way it should do, which creates all these insane side effects. You are most certainly not going insane, really because I have gone through everything you have and I didn't, and those who go insane never know its happening to them, they will usually be very defensive against it.

Take solace in the premise that the symptoms you are going through are not harmful in any way, they are scary yes, and very annoying, but just let them come and distract yourself from them as best as you can. Occupy your mind with work, games, reading, tv or go out and spend time with your friends, you girlfriend, have an insane night, do all these things even if you feel really bad and can't take it, and continue to do it, and trust me, it will pass in time. Anxiety disorder is triggered by certain memories, what you have to do is force your brain to stop that trigger by replacing that certain memory with something else. It sounds complicated but you can finds many help packages to help with it, I advise you look up a guy called Charles Lindel, a previous sufferer of it, who created an entire process by which to defeat it.

Now I still experience these feeling of derealization even now, but I've trained my mind to put it to the back of every other thought process, and I just continue with everything I'm doing, even if its really bad, so bad even that I look at my girlfriend and feel nothing, you just ignore it and it passes and gets easier, trust me on that. Hope this helps.
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Yup. You're going through the exact same thing I am going through to the T and it helps that you know exactly what I'm talking about. But also it sort of brings me down to know that you are still experiencing the derealization/depersonalization part. I have felt this stuff before but I always knew it would pass. The fact that it's been lingering really bothers me. It's that symptom that keeps the anxiety going. I am definitely going to see someone about this and I truly hope to get past it. One thing that bothers me is that this very situation that is happening now is what I would say tramautic. I am aware of this fact. What if I get past this and then I do something that reminds me of what I'm going through and it could trigger the entire cycle all over again.

I just want to be calm and not be hyper-aware of everything. When I'm calm everything seems in place and grounded, it's the anxiety that clouds my perception of reality and I need to get past this.

Thanks again for your response and I think I may have overlooked it in the past.
 
It does linger but everyone recovers in different ways, yours may not linger. You just have to ignore it the best you can, it gets much easier to do that over time and eventually the symptom may still be there but the edge is taken off it, and its no longer worth thinking about, its then that it starts getting better. The problem is once you recover you can't talk about your experiences, or even think about them, because that in itself can cause it come back. That was something I learnt the hard way, I mean most of last year apart from the summer I was fine, but I met my girlfriend last year and I told her about a lot of my experiences with it, and low and behold, it came back. Its just about training your mind to not even acknowledge its existence, once that's achieved, you can fully recover.

However, I have been told and read, countless times, that seeing someone about your current condition is very unhelpful, mainly because when you see someone about an anxiety disorder, they will talk about it openly, and that in turn brings it to the forefront of your mind. The key is push to the back of your mind and not to think about it. Basically its down to you to get yourself better, but sounds a lot easier than it is really.
 
Shift said:
It does linger but everyone recovers in different ways, yours may not linger. You just have to ignore it the best you can, it gets much easier to do that over time and eventually the symptom may still be there but the edge is taken off it, and its no longer worth thinking about, its then that it starts getting better. The problem is once you recover you can't talk about your experiences, or even think about them, because that in itself can cause it come back. That was something I learnt the hard way, I mean most of last year apart from the summer I was fine, but I met my girlfriend last year and I told her about a lot of my experiences with it, and low and behold, it came back. Its just about training your mind to not even acknowledge its existence, once that's achieved, you can fully recover.

However, I have been told and read, countless times, that seeing someone about your current condition is very unhelpful, mainly because when you see someone about an anxiety disorder, they will talk about it openly, and that in turn brings it to the forefront of your mind. The key is push to the back of your mind and not to think about it. Basically its down to you to get yourself better, but sounds a lot easier than it is really.
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That's what I thought and I was able to get through it on my own. The thing is, if it's a reoccuring thing, pushing it back may not be the correct thing to do. I mean it makes sense that talking about it brings it up to the surface but wouldn't eliminating the problem at the source be the ultimate solution?

Have you seen a professional about this? I would imagine that since this problem is fairly common that they would've had a pretty good idea on how to deal with it or eliminate it entirely even without the use of pills.

I'm already starting to sort of come into terms with this lol, guess I have to ride it out and see where it takes me.
 
Well anxiety is unfortunately not well documented at all, with doctors or mental health specialists, most of the best stuff in dealing with it is done independently from previous sufferers. And the source of the problem is to do with memories, as they are the triggers behind it. Anxiety disorder is a habit-based disorder, and it is obviously a very bad habit, the whole vicious circle of 'oh I'm starting to feel really weird, and ah crap everything is becoming distorted again' which then leads onto worrying about the problem, which in turn causes other side effects for instance eventual panic attacks.

But all habits can be stopped, its just via a state of mind, for instance to stop smoking people will generally do other things to keep their mind occupied for instance whenever they get a craving, it may be very difficult for a long time but it will eventually get easier and easier and eventually they will be free of them, they have reprogrammed the memories and habits involved with that, from a negative thing (wanting cigarettes) to a positive thing like a new hobby or whatever it was they did to take their mind off the cravings. Getting rid of anxiety works in pretty much the same way.

But yes the fact that you are coming to terms with it and seem to not be as afraid of it anymore is the first step, it takes the edge off it all really. Just remember that none of it is harmful at all, and whenever you are feeling bad, just do something else regardless, it will get better! :)
 
I made almost the exact same thread over half a year ago.


Needless to say, I'm still alive. Unfortunately, I don't seem to have found real lasting happiness, but at least I'm not insane.
 
morgs said:
I always wanted a relationship until I almost got into one, soon realized I love being single o.o
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Me too.. but then I found the ~One~, and I can't imagine being alone anymore.
 
endorphins & vitamin d; exercise & sunlight. probably the best way to go about it

good diet helps too
 
Again about meds:

For me, with manic depressive disorder, mania often causes symptoms similar to steroid "roid rage". You can imagine why this has been a big problem for me behaviorally: getting in fights, arguments, losing jobs and destroying relationships. So, I mean, I can make it through life without meds, but I just don't want to abuse people anymore. Well, I never did, but until I was diagnosed, I never realized that there was something wrong with me - it was just ****ING RAGE. (like I was saying before, perhaps evolutionarily this could have been an advantage)

I'm just so verbally abusive to people I love and care about. I don't want to be - it's almost like rabies or something? So that's just one symptom, and just one reason of many, why I have decided to get on medication.

It's up for you to decide if you want to deal with your symptoms or try medications. But first you need a doctor to determine if it would be helpful for you. Doctors don't want you to have side effects and live with it, they want to help you have a better life.
 
VirusType2 said:
Again about meds:

For me, with manic depressive disorder, mania often causes symptoms similar to steroid "roid rage". You can imagine why this has been a big problem for me behaviorally: getting in fights, arguments, losing jobs and destroying relationships. So, I mean, I can make it through life without meds, but I just don't want to abuse people anymore. Well, I never did, but until I was diagnosed, I never realized that there was something wrong with me - it was just ****ING RAGE. (like I was saying before, perhaps evolutionarily this could have been an advantage)

I'm just so verbally abusive to people I love and care about. I don't want to be - it's almost like rabies or something? So that's just one symptom, and just one reason of many, why I have decided to get on medication.

It's up for you to decide if you want to deal with your symptoms or try medications. But first you need a doctor to determine if it would be helpful for you. Doctors don't want you to have side effects and live with it, they want to help you have a better life.
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majority of meds are just serotonin supplements anyway, the reason people are so against them is because your brain stops producing it thus the side effects (missing a dose), so it's kind of like a never ending cycle of addiction. I think they would probably help for a kick start, but aren't really the solution to a problem.
 
haz0r said:
majority of meds are just serotonin supplements anyway, the reason people are so against them is because your brain stops producing it thus the side effects (missing a dose), so it's kind of like a never ending cycle of addiction. I think they would probably help for a kick start, but aren't really the solution to a problem.
Click to expand...

I don't understand how the brain just suddenly stops producing seratonin just by a change in your thoughts.
 
Your thoughts, your body, your mind, and you, cannot be separated either physically or philosophically. You are your thoughts, your brain structure, and the flow of chemicals throughout. Every thought changes your brain.
 
haz0r said:
majority of meds are just serotonin supplements anyway
Click to expand...
Well, I don't know if that's true, but none of the meds I looked at are.

220px-Orcarbazepine_3d_structure.png


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxcarbazepine

This is the one I'm going to be trying. Mostly because it had the most acceptable side-effects, I decided it would be the best place to start.

It also appears to be effective in half of patients with bipolar disorder and is well tolerated.[2]
Click to expand...
 
I've had periods like this. It may seem like it's here to stay but it goes in time.
 
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