Valvetime Anonymous Confessions

Sliver

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A lot of you might remember this thread from 2007, in which people would send in their most secret confessions via anonymous email to an email account for all of the site to see.

As the old thread and email account is long dead, and new users are rampant, I thought a new thread would be quite fitting. So here's whats going to happen:

1. You email [email protected] using an anonymous email host, such as "Send-Email."
2. Either myself or some others I that I may choose in the future will read the email inbox on a regular basis, and post the confessions in this thread for everyone to see.
3. You recieve a slight rush and maybe even relief as you see people read and talk about the dirty things you did to your dog when you were 7.

There will be some ground rules: please don't send me tales of growing up in West Philadelphia, or inane made up stories, I will, of course, be filtering out the obvious fakes. It's also a good idea to write outside of your particular style, as with some confessions it would be quite easy to pick out the forum member. "I once sleeped whit my sister."

Please remember that these are your fellow forum members, while some judging will occur you will need to keep it civil. Another thing to keep in mind is that confessions posted may not be suitable for children, and may contain graphic content of various forms.
 
I can already tell this is going to be a fun thread. And by fun I mean the Valvetime.net fun.
 
I'm just posting in this thread so that 3-4 years from now Vegeta can say that I did indeed post in this thread.

**** you Future Vegeta!
 
I once masturbated over the server while using it to download porn and then the server broke and ended up being offline for like a whole day.

...

Oh... Anonymous.

Forget I said anything.
 
I once masturbated over the server while using it to download porn and then the server broke and ended up being offline for like a whole day.

...

Oh... Anonymous.

Forget I said anything.

You act like this was a secret.
 
I once masturbated over the server while using it to download porn and then the server broke and ended up being offline for like a whole day.

...

Oh... Anonymous.

Forget I said anything.

Why not confess something that we don't already assume. You guys dick up the site too much for us to not think that.
 
I kept getting through enough to see posts, but every time I tried to post my jalbreaking pun in the "guy killed for talking on phone" thread it wouldn't go through. I would have been pissed if someone beat me to it.

Anyways, the sites back now, so confess you sinners!
 
I want to have dirty hot intercourse with my cousin. She's adopted though, so it's all good brah.

What bothers me more than being related, is that she's like 5 years younger than me. She's legal, but I still feel pretty creepy about it.

KzgUG.png
 
Still waiting for something more serious. Like somebody confessing to murder or something.

All this "hurr I secretly want to bang my sister" is so vanilla.

LOL
 
One time I violently pooped my pants sitting in my computer chair with the bathroom right across the hall. I swear I thought it was a fart.
 
I've been lurking this forum nearly every day since 2003 and have never made a single post.

I'm thinking the number of people who do this is quite high, has to be in the hundreds.
 
Me and a friend were playing a game of fart wars in the 7th grade, you know, where one person sneaks up on you and then farts in your face, then you try and retaliate.

Well, I thought I had a pretty good one brewing, so I ran up to him, put my ass in his face, and gave it all I had.

Guess I gave it a little too much...
 
And they all have an opinion about you Sliver.

I think that opinion would be "Man, he sure does post news and not a whole lot else."

...

When I was a kid, I would steal so much shit. My mom would take me into jewelry stores and I would just remove the tags from necklaces and pocket them. I got too guilty when I brought the jewelry home though, so I would throw it into the woods behind my house.
 
When I was a kid, I would steal so much shit. My mom would take me into jewelry stores and I would just remove the tags from necklaces and pocket them. I got too guilty when I brought the jewelry home though, so I would throw it into the woods behind my house.

At least you will one day cause much excitement for a group of kids that are going treasure hunting in the woods...
 
When I was in Junior/Elementary school me and two friends would take the money donated to the mission boxes (kids donated money to these in the mornings for third world countries) and spend it on lunch. Funnily enough, nothing was ever said about the missing cash.

Yes, I regret it.

Uganda be kidding me.
 
I can't decide whether to contribute to this or not, I keep saying to myself Namibia.
Probably just Egypt'n myself if I didn't.
 
click click ubanga doggle click ching chong nip nong hinger dinger click gutteral growl magic spirit man Kony click chong dong noodle nong Vietnam Mombasa wamba

President Barack Obongo give aid to my country of AIDS and Madagascar 2
 
These puns stopped making any damn sense a long time United States of Americago.
 
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