Enter The Combine

[ziahclonex]

Why did the combines choose to invade Earth?I'm sure with their technology and weaponry and armour they could've chosen to invade a much more technology-wise advanced society,but yet they chose Earth...why is that?Compared to them we are probably the most primitive beings they have ever seen!

Am I right?Or am I wrong?

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

In reality they go around universes enslaving species, stealing their technology and knowledge before draining the conquered world of any resources. Because their portal tech is so crap they couldn't get here becuase of Xen, but when the portal storms began they were free to move in on Xen, spotted us, and came here too. They'd been chasing the refugess on Xen for quite a while now.

Off-topic: Its good to see someone up as early as me.

 

[Zannovere]

Because they are ****ing nuts.

 

[Darkside55]

It's a little-known fact that one of Black Mesa's original projects was a SETI-esque attempt at communication with other worlds. Unlike SETI, however, who beam a peaceful "Hello" message into space, a few scientists thought it'd be a gas to send out radio waves of expletives and "Your momma" jokes, because they never expected to get a reply back.

Unfortunately for us a remote Combine satellite picked up the message. Nobody insults the Combine's mother.

 

[ziahclonex]

I've been up since two XD

Anyway,Darkside55 are you serious about the "your momma" thing?Because some how I highly doubt it! XD

 

[ziahclonex]

so when will the Combine leave us alone?Whether it's their enslaving hobby or their satellites that picked up a message,we are still utterly defenceless against a species as advanced as the Combine,no?

 

[madaimer]

It's a little-known fact that one of Black Mesa's original projects was a SETI-esque attempt at communication with other worlds. Unlike SETI, however, who beam a peaceful "Hello" message into space, a few scientists thought it'd be a gas to send out radio waves of expletives and "Your momma" jokes, because they never expected to get a reply back.

Unfortunately for us a remote Combine satellite picked up the message. Nobody insults the Combine's mother.

Rofl yes thats why

 

[Naudian]

so when will the Combine leave us alone?Whether it's their enslaving hobby or their satellites that picked up a message,we are still utterly defenceless against a species as advanced as the Combine,no?

Wait what? I don't see any combine.

I think you're losing your mind son...

 

[Jintor]

You can't see a Combine! That's like seeing a... a... mutation!

XO

 

[ríomhaire]

You're really underselling humanity. With the help of a little outside interference we've managed to fend off two alien assaults (Xenian and Race-X) and have, at the very least, been a thorn in the foot of the Combine. The reason they're here is the same reason that European countries set up colonies, reasources and power.

 

[Sheepo]

I'm sure Combine attacked Earth because Xen portal storms gave an open door in which the combine stuck their foot and put in offensive attack force suited to Earth so they could assimilate our people into synths that could be used in their vast synth army and siphon off our natural resources, but suprised by the human's resistance and intelligence are now being forced to crush a human rebellion. To them it's just another day.

 

[Asknoone]

Well the Combine picked us up following the cascade due to the vast amount of energy and what not. From there on they decided to force the portal storms wider in order to transport Citadels through. They enslaved us because were another species to add to their forces.

I'm lying of course. Darkside hit the nail on the head.

 

[i am HOLLYWOOD]

Wait what? I don't see any combine.

I think you're losing your mind son...

I see combines all the time. . . .like this one

 

[kupocake]

What they're really interested in, is HEV technology. They're going to create an upscaled version of the HEV suit and a series of insectoid bi-pedal battle synths that will do battle across the war-torn earth. Then they film the results and export the resulting television show (Aura Battler Combine) to a parallel universe where every life-form is a 20 year old Japanese male. The Citadels will then be retrofitted for the sole purpose of churning out plastic models of the mecha featured in the show. Thus, in the Combine's great plan, the earth becomes a giant Gunpla production and distribution centre.

 

[Slug Advisor]

They were gonna give us the secret of eternal life. Unfortunetly, we nuked their ships. They got angry and enslaved us.

 

[ríomhaire]

I see combines all the time. . . .like this one *snip*

Two different nouns my friend. A combine harvister is pronounced slightly differently to the combine empire. It's a very subtle difference, but it's still a difference.

 

[Jintor]

Two different nouns my friend. A combine harvister is pronounced slightly differently to the combine empire. It's a very subtle difference, but it's still a difference.

I'll combine you in a minute.

It'd be funny if the superior race turned out to be Combine Harvesters, hey.

 

[ziahclonex]

Ahem.

COMBINEs,my friends - I am still confused as to if the combine invaded because of their satellites picking up our message,the Xen portal caused them to come or they wanna turn Earth into,what the f*ck,a giant Gunpla Production and Distribution Centre? :bounce:

Omg,I must've missed something big if the renovations for the Gunpla main warehouse are already undergoing...

 

[Piers89]

Intergalatic domination and betterment of their race is missing from the poll.

 

[ziahclonex]

Closest thing to that is enslaving planets for fun,no?

 

[dumba$$]

i reckon it was cos earth is such a nice place, what with the terrorists and pollution.

hey, they're freaks, maby they like that sort of stuff.

 

[kupocake]

i reckon it was cos earth is such a nice place, what with the terrorists and pollution.

hey, they're freaks, maby they like that sort of stuff.

The Combine are into intergalactic S&M? Hence the mask fetish?

[truth]In Half-Life 2 Episode Three, Gordon Freeman fights a dominatrix slug.[/truth]

 

[ziahclonex]

Oh,so now they like terror and pollution?

 

[ziahclonex]

Gee,this poll isn't as hit & popular as my other 2 polls:Orb or Arrow? and Non-1-hit-kill Gun? :naughty: go check em out if you wanna be IN!

 

[15357]

I think I know why I rarely visit the Half Life 2 Forums section anymore, no offense to the OP.

 

[Remus]

Gee,this poll isn't as hit & popular as my other 2 polls:Orb or Arrow? and Non-1-hit-kill Gun? :naughty: go check em out if you wanna be IN!

No offense but what's wrong with you?...:|

 

[ziahclonex]

I think I know why I rarely visit the Half Life 2 Forums section anymore, no offense to the OP.

No offense but what's wrong with you?...:|

I am just so sexually obssessed with myself :burp:

 

[ríomhaire]

That's nice but please refrain from whoring yourself and double-posting. I'll report you the next time.

 

[ziahclonex]

Gee,sorry - what's a manhack against an antlion guard anyway?Btw,I know it's not your fault but "Ant lion" is actually one word --> Antlion

 

[Jintor]

...now you're spamming your own thread. I hope you're happy.

 

[ziahclonex]

I wanna close this thread - how do you do that? Never knew a little joke could come to this...