Have you seen this man's Penis?

CptStern

suckmonkey
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Thieves stole a man's penis while he slept, according to police.
Fei Lin, 41, of the Niqiao village near Wenling City, in east China’s Zhejiang province, told police he was asleep when the thieves burst into his room and put a bag over his head, according to CEN/EUROPICS and as reported in the Daily Star.
"They put something over my head and pulled down my trousers and then they ran off," Lin said. "I was so shocked I didn't feel a thing - then I saw I was bleeding and my penis was gone."
Police believe the attackers were jealous lovers of several local women whom Lin was having affairs with, the Austrian Times reported. Lin denied taking part in any infidelity.

Emergency workers and police searched for Lin's anatomy but turned up nothing, according to TNT Magazine. The penis thieves are nowhere to be found, but police said they're looking for the jealous lovers.

dude is screwed; like searching for a needle in a haystack

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/...ml?utm_hp_ref=crime&ncid=edlinkusaolp00000009
 
but there's scarcely enough for one never mind all of them
 
People? Haha. Human beings are the most ridiculous species on Earth. We walk around wrapped in pieces of cloth, adapting nature's environments to us instead of vice-versa, lusting after bits of metal and paper to exchange with one another that were at some point deemed to have value and discriminating against each other based on either naturally occuring things that can't be helped or personal perceptions of things that we as a species are ultimately responsible for.

We often murder each other in droves because the invented politics of a group of people living on one particular mass of land poking out of the ocean that covers most of our planet differs from the invented politics of those living on another mass of land poking out of said ocean.

That's people for you.
 
Burglary is a cut-throat business. Nothing wrong with trying to get a little head over the competition.
 
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