Spiders

JNightshade

JNightshade

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NOTE: I DID NOT MAKE THIS THREAD TO SPAM PICTURES OF SPIDERS IN ORDER TO SCARE CERTAIN MEMBERS. IF YOU DO THAT, I WILL PROBABLY LAUGH, BUT THEN THE MODS WILL CLOSE IT, SO TRY TO AVOID IT.


Anyway, I've noticed lately that a lot of members are terrified of spiders, and I just was curious as to why. Did you guys have a bad experience with one as a child? Just naturally scared of them? I find it very interesting, as I've always liked them a great deal (yes, I'm weird, I know). Anyway, please share!
 
It's probaly vestigial from when they used to be poisonous blood-sucking face-eating drug dealing suicide train-bombing child molesting attention whores. That's the only explenation I see right now.

Fortunately, I evolved the brilliant natural defence of shitting myself explosively, then proceeding to screem at it until it just dies of old age.
 
I love them on pictures, they look really cool. But I prefer to avoid them in real life. They don't really scare me, but the fast ones creep me out when they zoom over my head when I'm in bed. I usually suck them up with the vacuum cleaner.
 
I've always been scared of them. I don't mind the small ones, anything that is half the size of the palm of my hand and up I'll probably be scared off. D:

Especially the bigger ones, with long legs and move really slowly. ARGH!

I try to avoid killing them though. Not their fault I'm scared of them and I know they're more scared of me :p So I catch them in a glass and take them outside when I can :)
 
Never had a fear of spiders, a ridicoulous thing to be scared of, yet fear of spiders is the biggest irritaional fear in the world. People need to be scared of something.
 
I'm scared of anything that doesn't have fur I think.

I might be generalizing that a bit, but most insects/spiders etc. creep the hell out of me - at least, if they're in my house. I'm fine with squirrels, mice, rats, anything like that, but I guess if they were in my house my opinion might change.
 
I've never understood peoples attitudes towards insects. Sure, i might get momentarily startled if ones jumps out of nowhere...but that passes as soon as i realize im 20000 times bigger then it is!! What do you guys think they are capable of? They are just as afraid of you, except their fear is justifiable.

My friends wife is always getting him to kill spiders for her when she goes to the bathroom( they lived in a crappy basement sweet). And, he says that 2-3 times a week she wakes him up hours early just because she is so freaked out by them. I personally could not put up with that, id be like "bitch, if they things starts growing razor sharp claws and spraying radioactive ooze at you , then you can wake me up...otherwise ****ing deal with it." ;)
 
Ren.182 said:
I've always been scared of them. I don't mind the small ones, anything that is half the size of the palm of my hand and up I'll probably be scared off. D:
Click to expand...

Yeah, I'm sort of like that. I'm more scared of actually hurting one of them. Apparently, you will eat like six spiders in your lifetime.


D:
 
I used to capture spiders and feed them stuff.
 
I was so afraid of spiders as a child that I would go out into the garden, find woodlice or ants or whatever and I would throw them onto the web in order to feed them. I felt in doing so they would leave me alone. Ridiculous, yes, but there it is. I'm still afraid of them...I don't run screaming from the room or anything, but if it's large enough, and I can see its eyes and its atrocious body shape and legs I will stay well away.

I go into a kind of shock if they are on me, though.
 
Too many legs. Too many eyes. The way they move. The way they hide. We may be thousands of times bigger than them, but for their size, some can appear monstrously large. Some spiders have poison that is harmful, even deadly to humans. They are just downright creepy.

I can't place if this is where my fear began, but I remember having a dream when I was 3 about human-sized spiders chasing me up a mountain and impaling me. I also think that dream's the reason I don't let people touch me around my belly button.

I don't care if it's irrational or not, I hate spiders. I hate the damned things. I'll let certain ones live...if they're small enough or I've cleared them to be non-threatening. Once a spider passes a certain level of ballsiness though, that's it, I'm killing it. Or, more often, I'll get someone else to kill it because hell if I'm going near that deathbeast. The closest I'll come is within throwing range of it, and I'll be using a big book.

I can't even look at a picture of a spider on the internet full-view; something always has to be obscurred beyond the dimensions of the window, like a leg or part of its body, because I'm terrified if I look at them full on they'll jump out at me. If the legs are beneath the window, thing can't get out of the screen.
 
I. Hate. Spiders. I hate them so much it ain't even funny. I am not ashamed to admit I am very likely to scream like a little girl if I see one. I accidentally looked at one of those pictures of a big-ass spiders in the other thread and I had to shake it off before I could even sit back down. They ****ing freak me out beyond belief! Any spiders larger than my thumb must die and die quickly!

There are still stains in the living room ceiling because I smashed the biggest, heaviest book I could find in the house right in the face of two nasty-ass spiders who had the ****ing nerve to be crawling there. If anyone had been watching I would looked like a ****ing madman because I was crouching and screamed my ass off when I slammed the book against the roof and kept it there to make sure none of the ****ers somehow managed to limp out. I don't care, I'm irrational, I'm scared as hell and I'm ****ing racing with adrenalin at that point. The spider. Must. Die.

Phil Jupitus had a brilliant bit in one of his standups about his fear of spiders, he said that: "If you see a spider, you have to go into the kitchen and get a glass and a postcard. But then you must hurry back, because if you return to the place where you saw the spider, and the spider is gone... that's a shame. Because you can never ever use that room again in your life."
 
Darkside55 said:
Too many legs. Too many eyes. The way they move. The way they hide. We may be thousands of times bigger than them, but for their size, some can appear monstrously large. Some spiders have poison that is harmful, even deadly to humans. They are just downright creepy.

I can't place if this is where my fear began, but I remember having a dream when I was 3 about human-sized spiders chasing me up a mountain and impaling me. I also think that dream's the reason I don't let people touch me around my belly button.

I don't care if it's irrational or not, I hate spiders. I hate the damned things. I'll let certain ones live...if they're small enough or I've cleared them to be non-threatening. Once a spider passes a certain level of ballsiness though, that's it, I'm killing it. Or, more often, I'll get someone else to kill it because hell if I'm going near that deathbeast. The closest I'll come is within throwing range of it, and I'll be using a big book.

I can't even look at a picture of a spider on the internet full-view; something always has to be obscurred beyond the dimensions of the window, like a leg or part of its body, because I'm terrified if I look at them full on they'll jump out at me. If the legs are beneath the window, thing can't get out of the screen.
Click to expand...

I'll be the first to say; you actually remember a dream from when you were three?
 
I have an exceptional memory. I remember things from when I was YOUNGER than that. Also, that particular dream really stands out. I remember it in intimate detail.

The spiders that were chasing me were like widows. Big, black, and shiny, with giant abdomens. Three of them, skittering behind me up a narrow path cut into the side of a cliff. And I'm running like hell, I'm running toward a cave; I'm just about to make it when the lead knocks me down. And I'm on my back, and it raises one of its legs and jabs me right through my belly button.

Eff spiders, man.
 
I saw a spider in my bathroom. I got the deodrant, and sprayed it.
 
AJ Rimmer said:
I. Hate. Spiders. I hate them so much it ain't even funny. I am not ashamed to admit I am very likely to scream like a little girl if I see one. I accidentally looked at one of those pictures of a big-ass spiders in the other thread and I had to shake it off before I could even sit back down. They ****ing freak me out beyond belief! Any spiders larger than my thumb must die and die quickly!

There are still stains in the living room ceiling because I smashed the biggest, heaviest book I could find in the house right in the face of two nasty-ass spiders who had the ****ing nerve to be crawling there. If anyone had been watching I would looked like a ****ing madman because I was crouching and screamed my ass off when I slammed the book against the roof and kept it there to make sure none of the ****ers somehow managed to limp out. I don't care, I'm irrational, I'm scared as hell and I'm ****ing racing with adrenalin at that point. The spider. Must. Die.

Phil Jupitus had a brilliant bit in one of his standups about his fear of spiders, he said that: "If you see a spider, you have to go into the kitchen and get a glass and a postcard. But then you must hurry back, because if you return to the place where you saw the spider, and the spider is gone... that's a shame. Because you can never ever use that room again in your life."
Click to expand...
What he said. Especially the first paragraph.
 
D:
spiderman.jpg
 
You have to treat spiders with respect. They keep your house empty of other insects, especially annoying flies. But when their numbers get too big, you have to smack them with a newspaper. I used to like them, but now they have got too big(in numbers and size) that they get a smack right away if they get in my way.
 
I won't scream or anything when I see them, but I strongly dislike them and mildly uncomfortable around them. The small ones that is. I won't kill them if they aren't in my house or anything, hell, I won't even really avoid them. But those bigger ones... ah! They must die, if I can muster up the courage to get close enough to kill them.

Also, a fond memory comes to mind. Some of my family is big on fishing, not me, but I will occasionally float down a river with some of them. Well, there's a dead tree in the middle of the river, and we're sort of headed toward it. No big deal, we paddle a bit. Well, long story short, we end up going right under the thing. The branches are within inches, and there are THOUSANDS of spiders on it! Those spiders that make huge community webs. Oh God, even the memory is horrible. We almost got stuck on the tree, and all of us in the boat are scared of the things. I didn't feel right for a good thirty minutes.
 
Oh my god, I am also pretty damn terrified of spiders.

There are a few big ones in my room, I live in the attic, I pretend they aren't there, unless I can see them in which case THEY MUST DIE.
 
Spiders are funny, I don't affraid of them. But I'm terrified by worms and earthworms...
 
Solaris said:
Oh my god, I am also pretty damn terrified of spiders.

There are a few big ones in my room, I live in the attic, I pretend they aren't there, unless I can see them in which case THEY MUST DIE.
Click to expand...

I could so not ever get any sleep if I were you.
 
I've slept with a spider once. We didn't go on so good though.
 
See Beerdude's signature for my feelings on this subject.
 
I hate spiders that have long legs and run really fast. There's something quite creepy about it.
 
When I was about 8, I was playing with a Matchbox car that was stored in the garage. It was the Smokey and the Bandit Trans Am matchbox with the doors that open and close.

I sat down on the concrete steps just outside my house and when I opened the door to the toy car, something that looked like a shiny jet black spider fell out.

It fell out and fell right up my shorts leg as I was sitting there. It fell on my nuts!

I knew it was a spider, and it looked like a nasty black widow that I had heard about in books.


So as I jumped up and down terrified, it fell out almost immediately and started to crawl away, and I smashed it with a brick.

Sure enough it was a black widow. The poisonous one, the one with the hourglass shape on its body.

I put it in an old pill bottle to bring it to school for show and tell.



I don't mind spiders as long as they aren't within range of jumping or crawling on me and are outdoors.

I don't like to kill anything living, but I don't like anything crawling on me.


If I'm just minding my business and I feel something walking on me - that bug has some nerve. So I start walking on it. ;)




The black widow venom is a nerve toxin.
Click to expand...

lol, just noticed this here, pretty much describes where I found one.
MANAGEMENT:

Prevention
o Be cautious when picking up or moving objects, particularly in outbuildings such as shed or garages, or in shady undisturbed areas such as under parked cars or in flower pots.
Click to expand...
 
A kind uncle? I'm not sure what to say. Maybe I should do a barrel roll?
 
PsychoFreak said:
Maybe I should do a barrel roll?
Click to expand...

That is the best option in most situations.

There was one time when I let a decent sized spider walk along my arm. But that was because a girl with HUGE breasts told me to confront my fear. xD I was young and easily distracted :D
 
I am freaked out by almost all insects. Anything with those creepy little bug legs, really. So this includes, ants, or even butterflies and moths if they land on me. But it's not like I'll scream or get scared if I see a butterfly. It's just that once I went up close to one sitting on the ground and saw its legs and it creeped me out.

The larger ants are ****ing scary too. Luckily, my room has never had a problem with insects. Though one two occasions I found an ant crawling around my desk. The problem is, I can't even bare getting close enough to smash it with a tissue. Just because I'll feel it through the tissue. Ugh. I have to get a shoe or something, and then I still can't bare to look at it as I try to dispose of it.

I'm pretty sure I've been scared of spiders my whole life, and I can't think of any early traumatic event. I can however think of some pretty bad events involving spiders. There was one time I was putting on my rollerblades, and a daddy long-leg was on the blade. I had to ****ing get that thing (the rollerblade) off as quick as possible, which wasn't quick enough. I was thoroughly shaken for a good 20 minutes.

I was actually not scared of many insects back then, but I've grown to be more scared over time. I used to catch lightning bugs (those things that fly around during the summer at night and light up) but now I would never do that.

Tarantulas actually don't scare me as much as smaller spiders do. Their legs aren't thin enough. But of course they still scare the **** out of me.

Daddy long-legs are the worst though. Hair-thin legs, tiny little pod bodies.... Ugh god. ****ing creepy as hell.
 
Argh. Daddy-long legs. They always appear within the space of one month every year.
 
Ren.182 said:
That is the best option in most situations.

There was one time when I let a decent sized spider walk along my arm. But that was because a girl with HUGE breasts told me to confront my fear. xD I was young and easily distracted :D
Click to expand...
Unless she had quadruple Ds and had sworn to me on a stack of bibles and her mother's grave that she'd let me have unlimited access to her breasts for the rest of my natural life there is no way in hell I'd do that.
 
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