Your Most Embarrassing Moments ?

[Steven]

I once shat in a urinal.
I really needed to take a shit, more so then I ever had to. If I hadn't just shat in the urinal it would of been in my pants. So yeah obviously someone saw me shitting in a urinal. :|

 

[ZeeM]

I'm going to post mine. A lot of embarrasing shit has happened to me, but this is the peak.

Ok, so I used to clean up my "stuff" with a sock that I had under my bed for a period of two months or so. It was pretty efficent, but I won't go into detail about that. This went well, until the week before Thanksgiving. Around this time, every relative we seem to have (and trust me, my extended family is HUGE) comes over here. So the night before they all come over, my mom gets into freak out mode and makes my brother and I basically clean the entire house. She's helping me clean my room, and she decides she'll clean under my bed. For some reason, at the time the thought never crosses my mind that she may find it until I hear an "OH MY GOD!" Yep, there she is, the ol' sock in hand. She yells at me asking me "WHAT IS THIS!," which was mildly rhetorical because minutes later she said "I KNOW WHAT THIS IS, GOOD LORD MICHAEL!"

Yeah, I wasn't able to look her in the eye for about a week. She still bothers me about it to this day, also...

Stolen story.
I've read it on a different forum (genmay) . Unless it was you.

 

[DigiQ8]

*cough* *cough* dust !

 

[bbson john]

Stolen story.
I've read it on a different forum (genmay) . Unless it was you.

Haha. He thinks this is something honor so he posted his story in every forum with every language.

 

[jimbo118]

I once shat in a urinal.
I really needed to take a shit, more so then I ever had to. If I hadn't just shat in the urinal it would of been in my pants. So yeah obviously someone saw me shitting in a urinal. :|

wtf lol

 

[A True Canadian]

I once shat in a urinal.
I really needed to take a shit, more so then I ever had to. If I hadn't just shat in the urinal it would of been in my pants. So yeah obviously someone saw me shitting in a urinal. :|

Holy crap...


If the stalls are all taken up...I mean...a urinal? You could have at least gone in the garbage can or something.

 

[Slacker]

Ok, I'm bored, so here's another one of my high-ranking embarrassing moments.

It's homecoming night, and I have a hot date. She asked me (zounds!) a few weeks before the whole event, and I said a definite yes. At the time, we were kind of in the border between "friends" and "more than just friends," and that sort of thing (we had known each other since the beginning of middle school). So blah blah, we meet at another friend's house with eight or so other people, we get our pictures taken, and we get picked up in a hummer to go to a local Pizza place (yeah, we went to a pizza place in suits, go us) because none of us really had any money. So I pay for my date and myself, we eat some good pizza, and get back in the Hummer for Homecoming.

Cut to me arriving to homecoming. I get in, I give the tickets, and I go in to "cut a rug" when suddenly I get the worst pain in the bowles area that I have ever had. At first I dismiss it as just gas, but about 20 minutes later it comes back even worse. I go to the bathroom thinking that I'm going to vomit, but instead it comes out the other end, and not easily either. So for about 15 or so minutes, I'm sitting on a toilet in a public restroom with terrible stomach pains, in fancy clothes, in an area where the A/C didn't work so it was hot as hell. Finally, my bowles basically explode and I have the biggest attack of diherrea ever. I finish in about 20 minutes, and go back to dance.

This goes fine for another 45 minutes, when LOW AND BEHOLD another large pain decides to creep it's way into my bowles, and I have to excuse myself to the bathroom again. In short, I didn't dance at all the whole night because I kept having to excuse myself so I could crap more. And to make matters worse, not only did my date go dancing with other guys, but she decided it'd be funny to text all of my friends saying "haha, Michael has DIHERREA and he's not dancing! oh man!" So the next time I see them, they give me ****.

So yeah, that's my sob story. It ended up being food-poisoning, and even when I got home I was on the toilet. The lesson? SCHOOL DANCES SUCK.

 

[A True Canadian]

So yeah, that's my sob story. It ended up being food-poisoning, and even when I got home I was on the toilet. The lesson? SCHOOL DANCES SUCK.

I think the lesson here is you get what you pay for. :E

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

lol @ Siacker

When I was still living with my parents I also used to have a spare sock within arm's reach to get rid of my eh.. sticky business, but decided to throw it into my trashcan. So my mother comes into my room and says "something smells like fish in here" :x

another occasion was me, about 4 years old, in a full church, not paying attention to the ceremony at hand, and hearing something worth responding "yes, me! " to. End result: whole church laughing out loud and staring at my horrified face

Over to my teenage years: me, 13 years, horny, all alone at home, using phone upstairs to call sexline and having a decent pr0n chat with some chick. When all of a sudden downstairs the neighbour woman picks up our phone (she did not have a phone of her own so she used ours once in a while) and hears me talking nasty... yeah, not good.

I also shat my pants once. Only I was 25 years and having a bad case of diarrhea . Fortunately the toilet was only a couple of feet away, but I had to toss my underwear in the waste basket, really disgusting.

Oh yeah, a blocked memory from my early childhood: me and my next door friend, comparing our dicks when his father steps in. He ignored us but obviously he talked to my parents because a couple of weeks later I found a book in my house "what to do if your child is gay" or something to that extent

 

[Krynn72]

I found a book in my house "what to do if your child is gay" or something to that extent

lmfao. Thats great!

 

[Hectic Glenn]

Oh yeah, a blocked memory from my early childhood: me and my next door friend, comparing our dicks when his father steps in. He ignored us but obviously he talked to my parents because a couple of weeks later I found a book in my house "what to do if your child is gay" or something to that extent

haha, i really don't know what to think of that but i'm sure you learnt a lesson.

I can't think of many big embarrassing moments now, but i can think of a general one many people can relate to...lovebites. Especially when they are low and people KNOW a mouth has been there D:

 

[Warbie]

Oh yeah, a blocked memory from my early childhood: me and my next door friend, comparing our dicks when his father steps in. He ignored us but obviously he talked to my parents because a couple of weeks later I found a book in my house "what to do if your child is gay" or something to that extent

lol!

I had a similar experience.

At 16 I moved into my best mates house. We were smoking buddies and spent most of our time getting wasted and lazing around playing snes. After a few weeks of locking ourselves away his family soon began to act strangely towards me. It's hard to describe - they were overly friendly and accpeting in a very uncomfortable way.

Months went by untill, during a family gathering, they introduced me to some of his extended family as '*mates name*s very good friend'. The way this introduction was emphasised left little to the imagination, and wouldn't have been any more subtle had it been accompanied with a wink. Suddenly it twigged - his entire family thought I was his live in lover, and that we spent each day taking drugs and bumming for Britain.

By now a circle had formed around us and by the way everyone was smiling I got the strong impression that this our 'being recognised and accepted as a couple by the family' party.

None of his family had broached the subject with my friend in all this time and he was actually quite distraught. I thought it was piss funny The next day they stopped tiptoeing around me and kicked me out for being the stoner waster that I was.

 

[Parlez]

I WOULD USE A SOCK TO CLEAN UP THE AFTERMATH OF ME PLEASURING MYSELF.

LMFAO! ROFL! LOL! Call an ambulance I think I am going to die! I think I might just have to put that in my sig as well :E

 

[Ennui]

lol!

I had a similar experience.

At 16 I moved into my best mates house. We were smoking buddies and spent most of our time getting wasted and lazing around playing snes. After a few weeks of locking ourselves away his family soon began to act strangely towards me. It's hard to describe - they were overly friendly and accpeting in a very uncomfortable way.

Months went by untill, during a family gathering, party they introduced me to some of his extended family as '*mates name*s very good friend'. The way this introduction was emphasised left little to the imagination, and wouldn't have been any more subtle had it been accompanied with a wink. Suddenly it twigged - his entire family thought I was his live in lover, and that we spent each day taking drugs and bumming for Britain.

By now a circle had formed around us and by the way everyone was smiling I got the strong impression that this our 'being recognised and accepted as a couple by the family' party.

None of his family had broached the subject with my friend in all this time and he was actually quite distraught. I thought it was piss funny The next day they stopped tiptoeing around me and kicked me out for being the stoner waster that I was.

Oh my god that's absolutely priceless

 

[Warbie]

heh - I still wind him up about it, and pinch his arse and make lude comments in a camp accent whenever I go to his house and his family are about. Nobody else seems to think it's funny, but it is

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

haha, i really don't know what to think of that but i'm sure you learnt a lesson.

I can't think of many big embarrassing moments now, but i can think of a general one many people can relate to...lovebites. Especially when they are low and people KNOW a mouth has been there D:

Hell yes I learned a very important lesson. I haven't compared dicks for years after the incident. Then again I live by myself now, so anyone interested? :naughty:

j/k I'm married and have no gay feelings. Not that I'm aware of though :shrug:

 

[bbson john]

Then again I live by myself now, so anyone interested? :naughty:

I am afraid I will make you sad.

 

[sinkoman]

I'm like, 7, in my cousins room, hanging out with all her friends.

We're kinda loud, it's like, 12 am and her dad walks in a goes "alright, you guys shut up or you're all sleeping now".

So I dunno what hapened, but her friends (who I found hawt at the time) managed to talk me into whipping it out and letting them look at it, when my auntie walks in...

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

I am afraid I will make you sad.

so it's an urban myth that Asian men are erm... equipped minimally

 

[bbson john]

so it's an urban myth that Asian men are erm... equipped minimally

But our equipment is stronger than you.

 

[Tyguy]

tore ass in math class in high school, it was on a really hard chair so the vibration was very high. It might of been the loudest fart I have ever had in my life, and at that moment, every single person in the classroom, including the teacher, stared at me. I did what any one of you would do and blamed it on the girl behind me.

 

[ktimekiller]

lol

 

[Ren.182]

I once shat in a urinal.
I really needed to take a shit, more so then I ever had to. If I hadn't just shat in the urinal it would of been in my pants. So yeah obviously someone saw me shitting in a urinal. :|

Haha, that made me lol

 

[Beerdude26]

Well here goes. One time I was at this party and I saw this pretty girl across the room. She was talking to one of my friends so it was easy to go over there and join in. I drop a few good lines and after a few minutes its clear she is into me. We keep talking for a bit longer and my friend goes off to meet some people that just came in. Me and the girl decide to go find somewhere a bit quieter so we can actually talk. On the way up I see another girl checking me out and I realize I am the official PIMP of the party.

We went upstairs and found a room that no one was in. We walk in, shut the door and almost immediately she was on me. Lights go out and things begin to come off. I'll spare the details of what happened next but when it was done she said she had to go to the bathroom. She left and I sat there thinking about how awsome it was that I just hooked up with a chick at this party(It was one of those church things. I have some serious game and have a good eye for sluts).

She ends up coming back and jumps back into bed. She doesn't even talk and starts going down on me again. The lights were off so I figured it was perfectly fine to do it a second time. We finish and it wasn't as good as the first as something was off and I just couldn't place it but it was awsome none the less. I then tell her that she was great. She tells me I am funny then gives me a kiss and tells me she has to go back downstairs because her friends didn't know she was up here. She walks out and on the way out I hear a "Sorry...bumped into a friend" and I see the same girl walk into the room. They exchange looks and the girl I was just with lets out an "Oh shit..." From now on I will give them stripper names so you can tell who is who. The first girl I was with will be called "Candy". The second girl will now be called "Marla".

Candy looks over at me and screams "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SLEPT WITH MY SISTER"

When Marla heard that she just started to run downstairs and towards the door. When I got to the bottom of the stairs Candy started complementing the other girls sexual ability by calling her a slut and a skank. Of course to make sure everyone heard the praises and complements she screamed them at the top of her lungs. It was great to see the party go quiet and everyone look to see what was happening. When Marla left Candy turned right around and stared at me. Then at the top of her lungs she screamed "NO WAY DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH ME AND THEN MY SISTER, YOU ARE SUCH AN ASSHOLE!"

She quickly left in tears. This left me in the middle of the casual party with pastors and plenty of my friends and close family friends along with other religious people all staring at me with disbelief. At that point I decided I am going to be an upper level manager in hell. Suffice to say I got some respect among my peers after that but still get odd looks from church parents to this day and oddly enough they won't let me talk to their daughters.

That is both hawt and hilarious at the same time

 

[hool10]

I think we all have this in common, calling your teacher accidentally "mom" or "dad" in 1st grade lol. And the newest one is me graduting lol. I thought we go around this woman and go back to my seat but I guess you pass in front of her. :upstare: http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=857285937&n=2
I got a good one about my mom though. I had missed the bus one morning so I had to be driven to school. My mom notices our neighbor gardening. Here is what happened:

• Mom: Hi!
• Neighbor: Oh hi Cathy! How is Richard doing?
• Mom: Hi!
• Neighbor: Okay.....

So my mom just starts to leave like nothing happened. So I said, "don't you realize what you just did?" And she said, "no, what did I do?" And I started to say what she just did and my mom just said, "Shut up I hav'nt had my coffee yet!"

 

[Parlez]

tore ass in math class in high school, it was on a really hard chair so the vibration was very high. It might of been the loudest fart I have ever had in my life, and at that moment, every single person in the classroom, including the teacher, stared at me. I did what any one of you would do and blamed it on the girl behind me.

that made me lol :thumbs:

 

[Mr-Fusion]

Well it was when i was back in school. I was playing football in the playground and a kid tackled me to the ground, in the confusion i completely lost control of my bowels. Everything came gushing out in a torrent of filth. I picked myself up off the dirt and commenced walking towards the bathroom. The journey was painful. Morsels of shit leaking out of my trousers left me and my peers bewildered. Was i to catch these pieces so as not to make a mess? I was faced with a array of evil choices. A soggy, squishing sound could be heard as i moved through the forest of condescension, awkward grimaces, children dry wretching at the fecal horrors that passed them by. How could anyone respect me again?

That was embarassing!

 

[Parlez]

Well it was when i was back in school. I was playing football in the playground and a kid tackled me to the ground, in the confusion i completely lost control of my bowels. Everything came gushing out in a torrent of filth. I picked myself up off the dirt and commenced walking towards the bathroom. The journey was painful. Morsels of shit leaking out of my trousers left me and my peers bewildered. Was i to catch these pieces so as not to make a mess? I was faced with a array of evil choices. A soggy, squishing sound could be heard as i moved through the forest of condescension, awkward grimaces, children dry wretching at the fecal horrors that passed them by. How could anyone respect me again?

That was embarassing!

Well I was hungry :x

 

[ríomhaire]

This thread made me lol so many time I dug this up (I made it a while ago for no apparent reason)

 

[Tyguy]

should make him have a thumb up

 

[Ennui]

my friend called my AP Computer Science teacher "mom" in front of the whole class last year

 

[The Brick]

I was in a game of css and there was a random discussion about shaving going on. So I openly admitted that I shaved my balls the day before and then "54 year old cheese" sends me "lol"... Guess who that is. Yes, my dad plays counterstrike.

 

[Krynn72]

I was in a game of css and there was a random discussion about shaving going on. So I openly admitted that I shaved my balls the day before and then "54 year old cheese" sends me "lol"... Guess who that is. Yes, my dad plays counterstrike.

OH GOD

OH GOD

OH GOD


I cant ****ing stop laughing hahahahahah. I think i may have to make a seal of approval now too

 

[Griz]

I was in a game of css and there was a random discussion about shaving going on. So I openly admitted that I shaved my balls the day before and then "54 year old cheese" sends me "lol"... Guess who that is. Yes, my dad plays counterstrike.

LMFAO!!!!! You win.....

 

[Stigmata]

I think I may be able to dig up a few. The first three occur in elementary school, grade eight, in non-chronological order.

I was sitting in my window seat, not paying attention to the geography lesson. Or maybe it was math... I was just staring off into the sunny street, when I see a racoon up in a tree. I watch him as he walks slowly down the trunk of the tree, onto the sidewalk, along the sidewalk to the crosswalk. He looks both ways, crosses the street between the lines, walks along the next sidewalk, and climbs up another tree. He then climbs from the branches of this second tree onto the branches of the first, right where he started. I burst out in laughter, and everyone stares at me. This makes me laugh even harder, and my teacher stops the lesson and takes me out of the classroom.

A different time, in the same class, I started laughing at something, I forget what. But at the time, I had a bit of a cold/dry throat, so when I went to breathe in after my first bit of laughter, I felt the unstoppable urge to cough, and coughed without breathing in. I panicked and went to breathe in again, but coughed instead. Somehow I found this to be the funniest thing in the world, and started to laugh again, between coughs and attempts to breathe in, making it even more difficult to breathe. After about twenty seconds of this, I fell out of my chair and onto the floor, still laughing and coughing and suffocating to death, while everyone stared at me (again) and the teacher prepared for CPR. My friend, knowing my two weaknesses (susceptibility to laughing fits and my incredibly fragile emotions) goes in and slaps my face, immediately snapping me out of my laughter. I coughed, regained my breath, and got back in my seat, with my teacher staring me angrily in the eyes.

Now, second day of grade eight, before school starts. Everyone in my grade is in the schoolyard playing football, so I decide I'll join in. I randomly join one side and start running to the "end zone" so that maybe the QB will throw to me. Here is probably a good place to mention that we're playing our game parallel to a set of soccer goalposts, the three metal poles in an upside-down "U" shape. So I'm running oblivious to obstacles, looking backwards in case the ball gets thrown to me. Lo and behold, the QB throws a pass right to me. But he threw it about 20 feet too far, so as it passes over my head, I turn to face forwards, only to find, in mid-stride, an enormous metal pole a foot and a half away from my face. I slam into it face-first, sending an incredibly loud clang!!![/b] across the yard, and sending me three-quarters of the way through a backflip. I wake up and find myself face-down in the mud. Then the pain hits me, and I'm immediately rolling on the ground in screaming pain. I get walked off the grass into the principal's office, where I get checked for a concussion. As it turns out I'm perfectly okay, so I get sent back to class with a bump the size of half an egg on my forehead, and everyone laughing about my accident for two weeks.

This one actually happened to a friend of mine. We were in grade 10 science class in the "weather" (read: nothing) unit, talking about storm-predicting myths that we've heard. You know, if the leaves turn upside-down in the wind, or if your bad knee goes stiff, there's a storm a-coming! So my friend goes on about one he had heard from a friend of his mom's who happened to own a number of horses. She believed that when a horse's hair went up on end, a storm was brewing. He ends this rant with a somewhat suggestive, "and you just stick your hand in and feel around." Everyone turns and looks at him, and the teacher asks, "You mean in the hair?" So my friend makes an overtly suggestive and completely innocent hand gesture (palm up, middle/ring fingers extended and moving up and down) and says "Yeah, you just stick your hand into the bush and feel it."

 

[hool10]

Man I feel so bad for some of you people. Bump!

 

[Parlez]

I was in a game of css and there was a random discussion about shaving going on. So I openly admitted that I shaved my balls the day before and then "54 year old cheese" sends me "lol"... Guess who that is. Yes, my dad plays counterstrike.

ROFL! LMFAO! AH AH AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! HELP! I am going to die of laughing. I agree you win! LMFAO! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 

[the_rebel_medic]

Oh christ, when this happened I wen't redder then a bloody tomatoe.

I was in school, this year, and in maths. I had my jacket on which doesn't drape down very low. Anyway, I was working and my mate Blake says to me "don't you hate it when people don't pull their pants up properly?" I was rather deeply enthused in the work, as I didn't quiet understand it and dismissed him with a "yea, absoloutely" and continued working.

A short while later the teacher comes up and taps me on the shoulder, I turn around and she makes a sign to pull up my pants. At that moment the class exploded with laughter and I just wanted to die. After a short while I turn around to my mate and say to him "Uhm, he he, it was just my boxers showing yea?" and then he replies "Uhm, let me give you a clue, do you smoke crack?" I wen't an even darker shade of red and vowed from that day forth to wear my jumper, which is much, much, much longer.

Second one...
I was about 10 years old and we were on a holiday around the eastern coast and it was late at night. Mum and dad were considering driving on...until I shit my pants thanks to an onslaught of food poisoning. So we stop at a motel, and all get out, and wait at reception...while I smell like crap. People were staring and turning up their noses. Finally we got 2 rooms, and then wen't out to chinese. Everyone but me got delicious dishes...I got boiled rice.

 

[Temppe]

Some of these posts are incredible. Here's mine:
I was in my friend's kitchen with his girlfriend and two or three others when in walks my friend's father. There is all the usual "hi" and "hello" and curt nods. My friend's father gets something from the fridge and leaves. Then my friend says to me "I know my dad isn't the coolest, but... Jesus... you don't have to completely burn him like that". It transpired that his father had asked me something like "I havn't seen you in a while. How are you?" or something, and I, completely lost in my thoughts, stared right where he was and completely ignored him. And I have utterly no recollection of this happening. I must ahve been totally zoned out.

 

[hneaz]

This one is kinda unique.

In 8th grade, when i used to live in Singapore, i participated in a science fair with 4 other people. We qualified for nationals (Singapore is small country so its easy to go to nationals). we set up our booth really nicely and palced our apparatus on the table. we had people from various school checking out our experiement on the photosynthesis of water plants under different light temperature. i think i stepped out of the booth and suddenly this bunch of photographers rushed to our booth and started taking photographs. Couple of them bumped into me and i was taking a step back until i stepped on someone's foot. i turned around and i thought it was a teacher from my school, but he was like short, like 5 feet. i looked closely and i was like holy shit, its the President of Singapore!!!. i said sorry to him and he went to asked me what the whole experiment was about. i did my shit and we took pictures.

Later my advisor hit me on the head for being a dumbass...