Indiana Jones and the KotCS: Impressions

Yeah the best go from:
  1. The Last Cusade.
  2. The Ark of the Covenant.
  3. Crystal Skull.
  4. Temple of Doom.
 
Can't believe I've been defending this movie. :|

I love Indy as much as the next person, bought shirts... posters... Fedoras... even a bull-whip autographed by Harrison Ford which I had framed.

But, this movie was horrible.
It had nothing that makes Indy great.
They completely dropped a believable storyline for some half-assed excuse to cram as many over-the-top CGI effects that they possibly could.
I mean... Every fear I had about the film pretty much came true as the movie moved on.
UFOs, aliens, Indy's kid, possible spin-off, marriage, over-use of CGI, terrible acting, and a god awful story.
I couldn't even follow the god damn story... I really couldn't I honestly had no idea what in the **** I was watching.
They kept throwing all of this terrible CGI in my face that I couldn't follow what story there was!
I'll admit though, that the opening sequence up until they go and actually get crystal skull was actually fun to watch... and the first 20 minutes with Marion were fun.
But that was it, throughout the rest of the film I was bored and waiting for it to end. :|
Hell, I even liked Temple of Doom.

Worst film of the year, tbh.
Biggest let down for me since Star Wars Episode 1.
 
You guys really contradict yourselves when you complain about too much CGI...

Lord of the Rings?
Matrix?
Transformers?
Spiderman?
Pirates of the Caribbean?
300?

Did you guys also hate these movies because of the excessive use of CGI as well?
 
Yeah Blade Runner was even thought to have a remake in CGI. In fact the original with the "Hades" scene or the landscape scene in the spinner, were all CGI. The building's below were also just pictures. It's an ancient form of CGI, but it still is CGI.
 
PoeticRocker said:
You guys really contradict yourselves when you complain about too much CGI...

Lord of the Rings?
Matrix?
Transformers?
Spiderman?
Pirates of the Caribbean?
300?

Did you guys also hate these movies because of the excessive use of CGI as well?
Click to expand...

I'm pissed because of how excessively it was used and how horribly it stood out.

They really had no reason to make 90% of the scenes CGI, this is Indiana Jones ffs, not Star Wars.
 
think so

i find it actually exciting. the effects are great and the moves a bit odd somehow. but im excited to see it soon.
 
PoeticRocker said:
You guys really contradict yourselves when you complain about too much CGI...

Lord of the Rings?
Matrix?
Transformers?
Spiderman?
Pirates of the Caribbean?
300?

Did you guys also hate these movies because of the excessive use of CGI as well?
Click to expand...
It was a bit stupid when they make a bunch of gophers in CGI for no reason whatsoever, then:

those stupid The Mummy-esque killer ants.

hool10 said:
Yeah Blade Runner was even thought to have a remake in CGI. In fact the original with the "Hades" scene or the landscape scene in the spinner, were all CGI. The building's below were also just pictures. It's an ancient form of CGI, but it still is CGI.
Click to expand...
Blade Runner was set in 2019 ffs, which is more like our year 2090 being more accurate. It can use as much CGI as it wants because the objects don't exist.

It can't be easy to build a pirate ship either or a ****ing transformer.
 
I thought they actually refrained from CGI quite well. Considering.

Edit: Wait, the gophers were CGI!?
 
Druckles said:
I thought they actually refrained from CGI quite well. Considering.

Edit: Wait, the gophers were CGI!?
Click to expand...

It was damn obvious to me.

Refrained from using CGI? Did we see the same movie?

Nearly everything was CGI, from the birds to insects, even the ****ing flora.
 
xlucidx said:
It was damn obvious to me.

Refrained from using CGI? Did we see the same movie?

Nearly everything was CGI, from the birds to insects, even the ****ing flora.
Click to expand...

I think my showing was blurry. Maybe there was a reason behind it.
 
Don't start with that "understood" it crap. That's right up there with "it entertained me" in it's vagueness. It's like when people say AvP "entertained" them - they can't think of any real reason why it was supposedly good.

It was a shit movie.
 
It was ****ing awful.

I could point at various moments of the movie that were utter shite - being blown up by a nuclear bomb, Shia LaBeouf swinging through the trees with a monkey army in tow, the ufo - but dont need to. This isn't a 'it would have been great if they had done this ...' movie, or 'a could have been good save for ...', it was just shite from start to finish.

None of what made the previous Indy movies great was found here. I mean come on, it's so farcical it makes Temple of Doom look entirely plausible. This is what grates the most. There was always a shred of reality in the previous films. Light hearted, funny, but grounded enough to keep the adventure exciting, to make Indy seem real. The shoot out in the bar at the begininng of Raiders, for example - a great scene. Indy was in deep shit. Now take Crystal Skull - Indy can jump on to a truck full of AK weilding Russian soldiers half his age and beat them with his bare hands in a matter of seconds. There's no question whether he'll survive or not - they've super heroed him. The plot being utter crap and the movie not flowing in the slightest didn't help either.
 
should i just have said bashed it then cos that's what the guy in my links did
 
Honestly, I'm a little confused over what movie some people saw. Didn't seem to be the same one as me.
 
Guy is a total asswipe. Yes, I want to watch somebody eat ice cream, drink and then burp in my face while watching his review. He says the ending Blanchet having her face melted off. She ****ing turned into dust and dissipated! He could'nt even tell that the alien never really wanted to tell anything to a human anyways. The ending was really a wedding as well. The guy can't even remember how many crystal skulls there were neither. He also thinks there were 14 because in his mind, he thought the commies took the skull away from that alien. The guy is considerably confused at what happened in the movie and just overall lost. James the Nintendo nerd is the authority on the film.
 
hool10 said:
Guy is a total asswipe. Yes, I want to watch somebody eat ice cream, drink and then burp in my face while watching his review. He says the ending Blanchet having her face melted off. She ****ing turned into dust and dissipated! He could'nt even tell that the alien never really wanted to tell anything to a human anyways. The ending was really a wedding as well. The guy can't even remember how many crystal skulls there were neither. He also thinks there were 14 because in his mind, he thought the commies took the skull away from that alien. The guy is considerably confused at what happened in the movie and just overall lost. James the Nintendo nerd is the authority on the film.
Click to expand...

Yeah but I think it shows how confusing this film is also IMO


Spoonyone>AVGN (at least in review terms)
 
I predicted this film quite mightily if I do say so myself. I'm pretty good about these things without having actually seen them. It doesn't bother me to read spoilers about the movie either because I don't intend on watching it.
 
Raziaar said:
I predicted this film quite mightily if I do say so myself. I'm pretty good about these things without having actually seen them. It doesn't bother me to read spoilers about the movie either because I don't intend on watching it.
Click to expand...

Wow are you saying that you made a prediction that -some- people agree with and that validates your opinion so much you can hold it as fact without even seeing the film?

Go you.
 
smwScott said:
The movie was just dumb. It was awful. It lacked all the redeeming qualities of the originals.

And no, it wasn't because it wasn't realistic. It was because it was bad. The dialog was abysmal. Most of the one-liners and banter between characters was embarrassing. The action was absurd. Not because it was unrealistic, but because it was ****ing stupid. It was a kiddified, pussified, watered down Indiana Jones for a new generation. This is the result of tons of focus groups, family demographics, and George Lucas.

I actually didn't even mind the alien plot that much. But like everything else in the movie, they pushed it to the point of absurdity. The goddamn skull got more character development than Indy.
Click to expand...

We don't seem to agree much, but this is as spot on as it gets - especially, '.... kiddified, pussified, watered down Indiana Jones for a new generation. This is the result of tons of focus groups, family demographics, and George Lucas.'

Crystal Skull really couldn't have been less 'Indiana Jones' if it tried. It's so out of place it's hard to think of it as part of the same series of movies (it's more like a sillier version of The Mummy). Even the Young Indiana Jones series captured the sprit of the previous movies far better, and these had a comparatively miniscule budget. Ridiculous, illusion destroying action sequences aside, Crystal Skull was completely devoid of mystery, charm and any sense of peril - all the things that make Indiana Jones - and completely fails as a result.
 
Eejit said:
Wow are you saying that you made a prediction that -some- people agree with and that validates your opinion so much you can hold it as fact without even seeing the film?

Go you.
Click to expand...

Hell yes. I deserve a pat on my own back. <pats> You can give me one too for good measure.


On a serious note, I've been pouring through reviews and all sorts of stuff, and my fears that the movie has completely lost touch with its roots and has instead opted for the more hackneyed side of hollywood, seems to be echoed pretty strongly. I'm a nitpicker.
 
Pesmerga said:
Seriously, aliens? Crystal skulls? All devouring ants? What the **** was up with the gophers? Who thinks this shit up?
Click to expand...

Haha, glad you asked. Turns out every single element of the movie was based in folklore or losely based in fact.

The idea that aliens helped the ancient civilizations has been seriously considered by some (eccentric) historians, as some ancient structures (such as the pyramids) could not be built even with today's technology.

The crystal skull legend comes in part from the British explorer who Indiana Jones is based on, who claimed to have discovered a crystal skull. I believe his daughter donated a crystal skull to the Smithsonian Institute.

The "all devouring ants" (Army Ants) are indigenous to the amazon basin. They've been known to pick a dear-sized animal to the bone in about five minutes.

Other things like the KGB psychic research are based in fact as well, although of course in real life they didn't find any psychics. (The CIA had a psychic research program too.... that's where we got LSD from :D).

That said, the movie was still utter shit for reasons already explained.
 
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